The ICT Direct Winter Upgradathon!!

[ICTDirect_Dave]

Dave be wandering the warehouse like:

 

Positively villainous!

Why when he had all week to read it and then post it back today?

It's only been there since yesterday evening, and we've already banned time travel!

[Boredguy]

I was out the loop for a few days (or is it hours)

[DJ-1701]

To help us all out with image editing... I quickly removed the backgrounds from the images.

 

Click for larger images.

 

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Update Note: At request, updated with just heads as well.

Edited November 13, 2018 by DJ-1701

[LeMarchand]

To help us all out with image editing... I quickly removed the backgrounds from the images.

 

Could you do disembodied heads as well, please?

 

#imalazygit

[DJ-1701]

Could you do disembodied heads as well, please?

 

#imalazygit

 

Sure, though will have to wait until I get home.

[DJ-1701]

Could you do disembodied heads as well, please?

 

#imalazygit

 

Sure, though will have to wait until I get home.

 

Ok @LeMarchand, maybe before then...

http://www.edugeek.net/forums/windows/200985-ict-direct-winter-upgradathon-11.html#post1717701

[bald_pig]

Just throwing it out there, you've done it twice already!

 

Although highly unlikely, we reserve the right to change or cancel any aspect of the Upgradathon Competition without notice, including prizes awarded or these competition conditions

[LeMarchand]

Ok @LeMarchand, maybe before then...

http://www.edugeek.net/forums/windows/200985-ict-direct-winter-upgradathon-11.html#post1717701

 

Thanks!

[ICTDirect_Dave]

Just throwing it out there, you've done it twice already!

 

What can I say? I'm unpredictable

[alexsanger]

Bit late to the party, but still...

 

My trusty, long serving work rig consists of: Core2Quad Q6600 (from ancient home games rig), Motherboard from old Viglen classroom desktop, aftermarket cooler cos the viglen cooler couldn't cope, 8Gb of DDR2 800mhz (SLI certified!!) RAM, also from the old games rig, an old geforce 8800GT (yup, from old games rig too) for dual displays, a couple of old HDDs and a 120Gb Samsung 840 Pro salvaged from a broken laptop a parent was throwing out! All shoved into an old Novatech ATX case, with the side panel removed for cooling and ease of SATA hot swap.

 

The old Frankenstation still runs W10 admirably, but has started displaying some peculiar idiosyncrasies of late, and shown it's age when it's come to some heavy number crunching or graphics work. A shiny new system would surely improve my productivity no end!

[gerardsweeney]

I'm needing a new computer because my copy of XP no longer runs properly.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MnHEOJjexPE

 

My current spec:

 

CPU: Zilog Z80A, 3.54 MHz

ROM: 16 KB

RAM: 48 KB

Text mode: 32 x 22

Graphical mode: 256 X 192

Colours: 8

Sound: 1 channel, 5 octaves

Storage: External tape

 

I should never have updated from my previous O/S

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fPJMl49_k7A

[3s-gtech]

My work PC is an old Phenom II quad core. It got so hot inside the case (an old beige Antec jobbie) that I got DT to cut a hole in the top. Stuff now falls inside it and it's probably half full of lunch crumbs. I put my old AMD HD4850 in it for extra DirectX 10.1 goodness.

 

It's pretty damn fine, if now is actually 2010. Otherwise it's a relic.

 

I'm rather fond of it though, so I don't need anything better!

[DalekSec]

I recently got an upgrade:

 

 

Things it has over my Surface:

 

1) Never freezes

2) Unlimited battery

3) More Colourful

4) Eco Friendly

5) Can also be used as fire wood without explodings

6) Will never be outdated

7) Smooth slide action

8) Supports Thunderbolt 3

9) RGB

10) Cheaper

11) Can be fashioned into a shive to defend your love ones from the evil Doctor

[alexsanger]

Bit late to the party, but still...

 

My trusty, long serving work rig consists of: Core2Quad Q6600 (from ancient home games rig), Motherboard from old Viglen classroom desktop, aftermarket cooler cos the viglen cooler couldn't cope, 8Gb of DDR2 800mhz (SLI certified!!) RAM, also from the old games rig, an old geforce 8800GT (yup, from old games rig too) for dual displays, a couple of old HDDs and a 120Gb Samsung 840 Pro salvaged from a broken laptop a parent was throwing out! All shoved into an old Novatech ATX case, with the side panel removed for cooling and ease of SATA hot swap.

 

The old Frankenstation still runs W10 admirably, but has started displaying some peculiar idiosyncrasies of late, and shown it's age when it's come to some heavy number crunching or graphics work. A shiny new system would surely improve my productivity no end!

 

Pic requested by Dave

 

[UNCL3LARRY]

I use my personal gaming laptop for work so would love an actual machine I didn't have to lug about with me to and from work. I had a stellar gaming PC but a capacitor in the mobo blew and took the CPU with it. Got this laptop about half price through work, and paid for it using the left over components.

 

Specs:

i5-7300HQ 4x2.5GHz

8GB DDR4

GTX 1050

128GB M.2 SSD

1TB 7200RPM HDD

1 puny battery that dies after 15 mins

[CHiLL]

So I've been in this job now for nearly 4 years and inherited my workstation from my predecessor. Much like I inherited his desk and reputation (which I had to work hard to restore the faith in the school's IT support!). My workstation is a Dell XPS 8500, which has:

 

Processor: Intel Core i7-3770

RAM: 8GB

SSD: Intel 520 120GB

HDD: 1TB Western Digital

Graphics: Nvidia GeForce GT620

 

On paper that might look alright, but it is coming to the end of it's life, believe me!

 

The fan bearings! They drive me up the wall. They start whining and I have to resort to, lets say, 'tapping the machine with my foot', to temporarily stop the whining.

The SSD - 120GB is not enough for an OS partition any more, especially with the workloads that we undertake! I've found that my Windows folder now takes 60GB!

Video conversion - This CPU/GPU combination are now dreadfully slow when I'm tasked with converting video files for staff.

My audio jack will constantly stop the right channel audio working until I've crawled under the desk and wiggled the audio cable in the jack to get the right channel working (which doesn't always work first time and requires climbing under and back out of the desk several times to check whether it's working. This is much more annoying in the school holidays when I get a chance to stick Absolute Radio or Spotify on to help the workload and split the silence of nobody being in!

I like to leave my PC on so I can remote to it from home if necessary, but if I leave it on overnight, it will crash the next morning without fail. It' so infuriating!

 

I could get replacement parts for my machine, but that'd require forking out the cash myself as I can't get them passed our finance team!

[DJ-1701]

Bonus points for making us extra-heroic!

 

Let's give this a go...

[DJ-1701]

[starts playing a familiar tune that everyone recognises...]

 

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[is that YMCA?!]

 

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[Camera pans over to our heros!]

 

 

 

 

[Verse 1]

Young tech, there's no need to feel down,

I said, young tech, pick yourself off the ground,

I said, young tech, cause you're in an old school,

There's no need to be unhappy.

Young tech, there's a site you can search,

I said, young tech, when you're short on your dough,

You can surf there, and I'm sure you will find,

Many ways to get an upgrade.

 

[Hook]

It's fun to buy from ICT Direct!

It's fun to buy from ICT Direct!

They have everything for you techs to enjoy,

You can play with all their toys.

It's fun to buy from ICT Direct!

It's fun to buy from ICT Direct!

You can get refub, with a really great deal!

You can do whatever you feel (within reason!)

 

[Verse 2]

Young tech, are you listening to me?

I said, young tech, what do you want to build?

I said, young tech, you can make real your dreams,

But you got to know this one thing...

No tech does it all by themself,

I said, young tech, put your pride on the shelf,

And just go there, to ICT Direct,

I'm sure they can help you today.

 

[Hook]

It's fun to buy from ICT Direct!

It's fun to buy from ICT Direct!

They have everything for you techs to enjoy,

You can play with all their toys.

It's fun to buy from ICT Direct!

It's fun to buy from ICT Direct!

You can get refub, with a really great deal!

You can do whatever you feel (within reason!)

 

[Verse 3]

Young tech, I was once in your shoes,

I said, I was down and out with the blues,

I felt no Head cared how hard I would strive,

I felt the whole world was so jive.

That's when someone came up to me,

And said, young tech, check out this digital site,

There's a place here called ICT Direct,

They can start you back on your way.

 

[Outro]

It's fun to buy from ICT Direct!

It's fun to buy from ICT Direct!

They have everything for you techs to enjoy,

You can play with all their toys.

ICT Direct... It's fun to buy from ICT Direct!

Young tech, young tech, there's no need to feel down,

Young tech, young tech, get yourself off the ground.

ICT Direct... you'll find it all at ICT Direct!

No tech, no tech does it all by themself,

Young tech, young tech, put your pride on the shelf.

ICT Direct... just go to ICT Direct!

Young tech, young tech, are you listening to me?

Young tech, young tech, what do you wanna build?

ICT Direct... you find at ICT Direct...

No one, no one does it all by themself,

Young tech, young tech, put your pride on the shelf.

ICT Direct... just go to ICT Direct!

Young tech, young tech I was watching the news,

Young tech, young tech now you've beaten the blues!

 

[ICTDirect_Dave]

That. Is. Brilliant!

 

Scary though!

 

I should also say, that I said you have to make John & I look heroic. But do what you like with the other lads

[HarryMonkey]

I could get replacement parts for my machine, but that'd require forking out the cash myself as I can't get them passed our finance team!

 

So maybe the next time finance need something doing it could take several days due to the slow and temperamental equipment that you have to work with

 

Just saying.

[CHiLL]

So maybe the next time finance need something doing it could take several days due to the slow and temperamental equipment that you have to work with

 

Just saying.

Tried going down that route! They have more clout than us with SLT/Head and we started getting a lot of pressure from management because of it. We learnt just to live with the politics instead. Maybe not the greatest solution, but the one with the least hassle!

[mikeprice]

[starts playing a familiar tune that everyone recognises...]

 

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[is that YMCA?!]

 

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[ATTACH=CONFIG]50962[/ATTACH]

 

Was that what he meant by Heroic??

[LeMarchand]

It is now time for the horror of my next machine to be revealed.

 

Part One.

 

Part Two.

 

Stave three

 

The Technician was now in an open area that he recognised as being in a different school where he was employed. Once again, he could see himself – but this other self was much closer to his own appearance. The other him had a computer case open and parts laid over three tables that had been pushed together. Like the protagonist of Mrs Shelly’s novel he was creating new life from old; a case and board from home, parts bought at his own expense from online emporiums of second-hand goods, memory grave-robbed from dead computers, hard drives (nothing as modern as a drive whose state was solid) kept by “just in case”, screens saved from being thrown out and the like.

 

The Technician remembered this time, for it was but a few scant months past, but even then he had had hope that this morbid surgery would at least furnish him with a machine superior to that with which he wrestled each day. Unlike Doctor Frankenstein’s creature, The Technician’s creation was outwardly attractive: a shiny black front supporting three screens, the centre of which was even wider than it was tall. It had even attracted envious - if misguided – comments from some members of staff.

 

“Why has the computer boy been given THREE computers?” one had asked.

 

“Indeed,” had agreed another. “I am in charge of Class 2T, English AND the stationery cupboard. I should have a laptop for each role.”

 

“Derp,” was all the P.E. Teacher could manage.

 

The Technician’s heart was already beginning to sink, for he knew that his creature - like that of Doctor Frankenstein himself - would be flawed. The phantom extended his finger and made the curious circling motion again and, when the flow of time had been returned to its normal pace, The Technician saw his other self slumped in despair at his desk. He knew full well what the cause would be, and a glance at the screens in front of the doppelganger confirmed his theory. His other self had made the fatal error of opening a browser, an RDP session AND Spotify and the machine had ground to a halt. He could hear the fans on the second-hand graphics card straining and feel the warmth emanating from the tower. In the corner of one screen, obscured by dead and dying pixels, he could see the terrible truth of the monster that he had created.

 

Medion MD8828 case MSI MS7205 board

Core2Duo E6750 @ 2.66 GHz

4GB RAM W10 EDU x64

XFX Radeon HD 6850

100MB Network connection

Zalman ZM-M300 mouse with an all-too-easy to trigger “rapid fire” mode

£1 mouse mat

2x CTX 1024x768 monitors

1x AOC 1920x1080 monitor with failing contrast

 

Truly, he was one of the damned.

 

Once again, the world shook…

[DalekSec]

Gotta say, i am slightly pleased on how this worked out, i winged it in one go!

 

For those who don't know the format, it's the four yorkshiremen by Monty Python

 

(Four well-dressed former IT Techs sitting together at a vacation resort. 'Half Life 3 Theme Tune' being played in the background on Hawaiian guitar.)

 

DJ-1701: Ahh.. Very passable, this, very passable.

 

Dalek: Nothing working through a lot of helpdesk tickets on our new ICT Direct PCs hey DJ?

 

LeMarchand: You're right there Dalek.

 

Mike Price: Who'd a thought thirty years ago we'd all be here with our high end workstations?

 

DJ-1701: Aye. In them days, we'd a' been glad to a quad core CPU.

 

Dalek: A dual core CPU.

 

Mike Price: Without hyperthreading or turbo boost.

 

LeMarchand: OR any cores!

 

DJ-1701: With a faulty Motherboard.

 

Mike Price: We never used a PC case best we could use was a bit of metal

 

Dalek: The best WE could manage was to stick it in a bin liner.

 

LeMarchand: But you know, we were happy in those days, though we had poor PCs.

 

DJ-1701: Aye. BECAUSE we had poor PCs. My old manager used to say to me, 'Your PC is fast enough.'

 

Mike Price: 'E was right. I was happier then and I had 512Mb of RAM'. We used to have a GPU with only the one VGA output.

 

Dalek: VGA? You were lucky to have a VGA! I had a GPU with only S-VIDEO that couldn’t output video!

 

LeMarchand: You were lucky to have a S-VIDEO! *We* used to have integrated graphics.

 

DJ-1701: Ohhhh we used to DREAM of having graphics!! We used to have AMD CPUs without any on board graphics and had to have a GPU via USB to power a monitor!

 

Mike Price: Well when I say 'VGA' it was only to a monitor of a resolution of 340x240

 

Dalek: My GPU was taken off of me and I had to do with no video output!

 

LeMarchand: You were lucky to have no video output! My GPU only outputted white noise!

 

Dalek: AMD GPU?

 

LeMarchand: Aye.

 

DJ-1701: You were lucky! I would switch my PC on at 6am and it would boot at 1pm, take another 2 hours to get to the desktop and then my manager would hit me for not doing any work!

 

Dalek: Luxury. I used to switch my PC on before I left home the day before and it will still be booting when I get in in the morning. It would log in at 4pm and I’d manage to send 1 email before I had to restart it to clear some RAM cache.

 

LeMarchand: Well we had it tough. I used to restart my PC 12 times a day, 7 days a week and I managed to once send an email!

 

Mike Price: Right. I had to switch on my computer 1 week before and It would take 2 weeks to load. I had to restart it 8 days a week to keep it going and reseat the RAM after each email I sent and my manager would kill me each lunchtime, and dance about on my graves singing 'Hallelujah.'

 

DJ-1701: But you try and tell the young people today that... and they won't believe ya'.

 

ALL: Nope, nope..

[mikeprice]

Are you trying to say I'm a cynical grumpy old git???

 

 

*EDIT*

 

 

 

my wife just saw this over my shoulder and says yes