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Posted

OK - normally I take 'jokes' like this and 'improve' them and then post them

 

 

but this is so bad I really want to totally attribute it to the person who initiated it - so I screenshotted it

 

Screenshot 2021-01-20 200157.png

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Posted
Not for this he doesn't. :p If he was a magician and he'd premiered a trick this awful he'd have been kicked out of the Magic Circle!!

 

...are you saying he'd be made to....... disappear?

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Posted
I would love to get paid to sleep. It would be a dream job!

 

Get yourself a peerage, head of to the House of Lords, and your dreams will come true!

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Posted

I'm not putting this forward as an actual joke

 

 

it is kinda like a joke

 

butthis is how bad it can get

 

Last week I bought an alarm clock made out of spuds.

It's ok, but it's driving me mad now as the alarm keeps getting me up potato clock.

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Posted

Just had a humbling moment there.

Have a fella decorating my house - got chatting to him and turns out he's a pilot on furlough.

He's taken up work as a decorator to try and pay his mortgage

 

appalling like but he did a great job on the landing.

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Posted

Reminds me of my old physics teacher, describing waveforms.

 

The best way to remember amplitude is, imagine an ant climbing up the wave and eating his dinner. By the time he gets to the top, he'll have amply chewed it.

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