[joke] The Dad Jokes Thread

[andyace]

this ant joke thing was a stand-up routine by Bridget Christie (Its On YouTube)

the routine goes that you ask the question and the answer end with ANT, sounds benign but we played it all week while skiing, gets into your head after a while.

 

Eg What do you call an Ant that floats ? a Buoyant

[Ditto]

Keeping it edu!

An ant that bunks off school - Truant

 

That'll be the last one from me!

[andyace]

what do you call and ant that does the computational arithmetic for other peoples businesses ?

[6Foot2]

... That'll be the last one from me!

 

Leving that here as a remnant?

[jmak]

Dear Andy

 

I've never met an ant that hangs around your neck. I do know some that hang from chains that could go round someone's neck.

 

Best wishes

 

Ped

No one biting? Pedant

A pendant.

See above

 

what do you call and ant that does the computational arithmetic for other peoples businesses ?

Accountant

[6Foot2]

An ant that is a vital part of the economy, levying charges on goods or services coming into the country.

 

Important.

[Garacesh]

What about an ant that can navigate the high seas?

 

Sextant, of course.

[andyace]

What do you call an ant that puts out fires

[GiggleKitteh]

An ant that lives 10 years - decadant

[Oaktech]

What do you call an ant that puts out fires ������

 

Hydrant?

[6Foot2]

An ant that refuses to join the others in the nest?

 

Resistant.

[andyace]

What do you call a baby ant ?

[6Foot2]

What do you call a baby ant ?

 

Infant.

_____________________________________________

 

What do you call an ant that is in agreement with others?

 

Concordant.

[GrumbleDook]

In a gruesome accident at a nuclear reactor due to an infestation of insects, an engineer lost parts of a leg which were grafted onto one of the nest's workers. It developed sentience and provided an inside understanding of insect life. Zoologists fought against just giving it a number and wanted a name. The insect laughed and said it was obvious.

...

...

...

Ant Toe Knee.

[andyace]

What do you call a baby ant ?

 

 

an infant

[6Foot2]

Link:

 

 

* Absent Without Official Ovine Leave

[korifugi]

What do you call an ant that won't stop making ant jokes?

 

 

 

Unrepentant

[Ditto]

An ant that tells too many ant jokes - irritant.

[6Foot2]

What do you call an ant that won't stop making ant jokes?

 

 

 

Unrepentant

 

Incessant

[GiggleKitteh]

An ant dictator - Tyrant

[HarryMonkey]

Glass coffins! Will they be popular?

 

Remains to be seen.

[6Foot2]

My friend couldn’t afford his water bill so I sent him a “Get Well Soon” card.

[southhamster]

I tried to walk like an Egyptian and now I need to see a Cairo practor.

[6Foot2]

Link: Ossining Police Department Facebook Page

 

[Norphy]

Basil Brush must be moonlighting for the Ossining Police Department :\