mikeprice Posted October 25, 2022 Posted October 25, 2022 I don't know if this fits here, but if we had a thread called "I'm an idiot and I think this is funny" I'd have put it in that. So I've not long bought a house and redecorating the bedrooms. Sparky had to run a cable so I've been putting the drywall back. I've found a very old tobacco tin from the garage (must have been from the '40s or '50s) and I've written "Yeah I'd be disappointed too" on a bit of paper, sealed that in an envelope, folded that up and put it in the ancient tobacco tin, wrapped that in a transparent plastic bag, taped that up too (battered metal tin still quite discernable) and hidden it in the drywall. I intend to live for another 40 years so it may be 50 odd years before some excited homeowner re-models and discovers this. Maybe even the better part of a century. I am quite prepared to play the long gag on this one. EDIT - I must say it does look the part: [ATTACH=CONFIG]66833[/ATTACH] [ATTACH=CONFIG]66834[/ATTACH] You do realise that when you die you will have to come back and haunt that specific house so you can be on hand when the 'joke' comes to fruition? reminds me of when I demolished one of the shed that were here when I moved in Under the floor - pushed as far back as possible - was a tin box it was quite heavy - about 1 foot by 9 inches and 3 inches high What was in it?? was it the proceeds of a bank job and filled with crisp - but out of date - twenties was it a cache of drugs was it TREASURE!!! nope - full of old engine oil I reckon a child of the previous owner changed the oil on a motorbike and couldn't be bothered to get rid of it properly so just hid it!! B****r 2
Ditto Posted October 25, 2022 Posted October 25, 2022 I don't know if this fits here, but if we had a thread called "I'm an idiot and I think this is funny" I'd have put it in that. So I've not long bought a house and redecorating the bedrooms. Sparky had to run a cable so I've been putting the drywall back. I've found a very old tobacco tin from the garage (must have been from the '40s or '50s) and I've written "Yeah I'd be disappointed too" on a bit of paper, sealed that in an envelope, folded that up and put it in the ancient tobacco tin, wrapped that in a transparent plastic bag, taped that up too (battered metal tin still quite discernable) and hidden it in the drywall. I intend to live for another 40 years so it may be 50 odd years before some excited homeowner re-models and discovers this. Maybe even the better part of a century. I am quite prepared to play the long gag on this one. EDIT - I must say it does look the part: [ATTACH=CONFIG]66833[/ATTACH] [ATTACH=CONFIG]66834[/ATTACH] Justification for posting this pair
6Foot2 Posted October 25, 2022 Author Posted October 25, 2022 I don't know if this fits here, but if we had a thread called "I'm an idiot and I think this is funny" I'd have put it in that. So I've not long bought a house and redecorating the bedrooms. Sparky had to run a cable so I've been putting the drywall back. I've found a very old tobacco tin from the garage (must have been from the '40s or '50s) and I've written "Yeah I'd be disappointed too" on a bit of paper, sealed that in an envelope, folded that up and put it in the ancient tobacco tin, wrapped that in a transparent plastic bag, taped that up too (battered metal tin still quite discernable) and hidden it in the drywall. I intend to live for another 40 years so it may be 50 odd years before some excited homeowner re-models and discovers this. Maybe even the better part of a century. I am quite prepared to play the long gag on this one. EDIT - I must say it does look the part: [ATTACH=CONFIG]66833[/ATTACH] [ATTACH=CONFIG]66834[/ATTACH] I am reminded of: Link: Man who hid fake moustache under water valve waits five months to finish terrible pun | ITV News A man who found a fake moustache hidden underneath a water valve in his house later discovered his housemate had been planning an excruciatingly long-term dad-joke. "Five months ago, my roommate John moved out," Reddit user Ryan Kramer explained. "I haven't been in his room since then, however this week, behind a tiny door that accesses a water valve, we found a little surprise." Mr Kramer says he then sent John "a confused text", to which he finally received the punchline. "You found it! My secret 'stache!" it said. "He has been waiting five months to make that pun," Ryan concluded. Posted on ITV News website: Thursday 18th of September 2014. 3
DalekSec Posted October 25, 2022 Posted October 25, 2022 I don't know if this fits here, but if we had a thread called "I'm an idiot and I think this is funny" I'd have put it in that. So I've not long bought a house and redecorating the bedrooms. Sparky had to run a cable so I've been putting the drywall back. I've found a very old tobacco tin from the garage (must have been from the '40s or '50s) and I've written "Yeah I'd be disappointed too" on a bit of paper, sealed that in an envelope, folded that up and put it in the ancient tobacco tin, wrapped that in a transparent plastic bag, taped that up too (battered metal tin still quite discernable) and hidden it in the drywall. I intend to live for another 40 years so it may be 50 odd years before some excited homeowner re-models and discovers this. Maybe even the better part of a century. I am quite prepared to play the long gag on this one. EDIT - I must say it does look the part: [ATTACH=CONFIG]66833[/ATTACH] [ATTACH=CONFIG]66834[/ATTACH] Did something similar in last couple houses. Tin full of small toys below floorboards in one and writing over the wall under plasterboard in another (cant remember what it was!)
mikeprice Posted October 25, 2022 Posted October 25, 2022 I am reminded of: Link: Man who hid fake moustache under water valve waits five months to finish terrible pun | ITV News [ATTACH=CONFIG]66835[/ATTACH] [ATTACH=CONFIG]66836[/ATTACH] Posted on ITV News website: Thursday 18th of September 2014. That sort of thing can backfire on you many years ago I was working on the weekend getting a program coded and was the only one in the whole floor of the building and bored I was coding the date validation section - as a professional programmer (well - I got paid for it) I had done that MANY times and I put in a line that said if the day was 29 and the month was 2 then print "Happy Leap Year Day" Normally my programmes had several little bits I did when bored - such as having a variable called Dracula - when all variables had to be things like WS17-index - or whatever I lived for when an inexperienced programmer asked me why it was called Dracula Clearly it was because it was a count sorry happened twice - would have happened more if the bar steward experienced programmers had not warned the new trainee anyway this one went wrong the program was supposed to be run late afternoon but one day things were running very late so the program ran at about 2 a.m. and it came up with an unexpected message and I was "on call" so I got a phone call at 2 a.m. asking about this unexpected message Took me several minutes to wake up enough to hear properly and remember that Satrday when I was bored AND work out what date it was to this day I am not sure they did not **** themselves laughing after the end of the phone call but it did rebound here endeth the story
6Foot2 Posted October 27, 2022 Author Posted October 27, 2022 [ATTACH=CONFIG]65680[/ATTACH] A map of Europe drawn from memory. On the map, we can see: 1 GB ROMainia DDR (or where it was) The Isle of RAM 1
6Foot2 Posted October 28, 2022 Author Posted October 28, 2022 Dad('s Army) joke! *You might have to ask an older relative... Link: Simon Drew [^ Artist] 3
hardtailstar Posted October 28, 2022 Posted October 28, 2022 I am reminded of: Link: Man who hid fake moustache under water valve waits five months to finish terrible pun | ITV News [ATTACH=CONFIG]66835[/ATTACH] [ATTACH=CONFIG]66836[/ATTACH] Posted on ITV News website: Thursday 18th of September 2014. Why didn't he text.... "I moustache you a question" Missed opportunity!! 2
3s-gtech Posted October 28, 2022 Posted October 28, 2022 I’ve up a campsite for that also caters for aquatic mammals. It’s called For All In Tents and Porpoises. 1
mikeprice Posted October 30, 2022 Posted October 30, 2022 (edited) Wife has told me the clocks have to go back really annoying as I only bought them last week and they seemed fine Edited October 30, 2022 by mikeprice 1
3s-gtech Posted October 30, 2022 Posted October 30, 2022 I’ve set up a campsite that also caters for aquatic mammals. It’s called For All In Tents and Porpoises. Damn, that doesn’t work with such bad grammar! Quotey fixy!
6Foot2 Posted October 30, 2022 Author Posted October 30, 2022 Damn, that doesn’t work with such bad grammar! Quotey fixy! Another "off target" joke: 1
mikeprice Posted October 31, 2022 Posted October 31, 2022 One for the mods to check out found on a cycling forum 1
mikeprice Posted November 1, 2022 Posted November 1, 2022 Phew - managed to survive Halloween CLEARLY not frighten of witches But did have a load of Trick or Treaters on the doorstep, all dressed up as Gloria Gaynor! At first I was afraid. I was petrified. 3
6Foot2 Posted November 4, 2022 Author Posted November 4, 2022 My brother has planned tomorrow evening very carefully and has labelled each firework sequentially so that I can hand them to him correctly. If I get it wrong, it'll be bang out of order! 1
6Foot2 Posted November 5, 2022 Author Posted November 5, 2022 Link: https://twitter.com/marcosquawks/status/1587424001072287745 [Picture Tweet] 2
Popular Post mikeprice Posted November 7, 2022 Popular Post Posted November 7, 2022 Probably more a GranDad joke but.... On the first day, God created the dog and said, "Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at anyone who comes in or walks past. For this, I will give you a life span of twenty years." The dog said, "That's a long time to be barking. How about only ten years and I'll give you back the other ten?" And God saw it was good. On the second day, God created the monkey and said, "Entertain people, do tricks, and make them laugh. For this, I'll give you a twenty-year life span." The monkey said, "Monkey tricks for twenty years? That's a pretty long time to perform. How about I give you back ten like the dog did?" And God, again saw it was good. On the third day, God created the cow and said, "You must go into the field with the farmer all day long and suffer under the sun, have calves and give milk to support the farmer's family. For this, I will give you a life span of sixty years." The cow said, "That's kind of a tough life you want me to live for sixty years. How about twenty and I'll give back the other forty?" And God agreed it was good. On the fourth day, God created humans and said, "Eat, sleep, play, marry and enjoy your life. For this, I'll give you twenty years." But the human said, "Only twenty years? Could you possibly give me my twenty, the forty the cow gave back, the ten the monkey gave back, and the ten the dog gave back; that makes eighty, okay?" "Okay," said God, "You asked for it." So that is why for our first twenty years, we eat, sleep, play and enjoy ourselves. For the next forty years, we slave in the sun to support our family. For the next ten years, we do monkey tricks to entertain the grandchildren. And for the last ten years, we sit on the front porch and bark at everyone. Life has now been explained to you. There is no need to thank me for this valuable information. I'm doing it as a public service. If you are looking for me I will be on the front porch. 5
6Foot2 Posted November 8, 2022 Author Posted November 8, 2022 I had my leg X-rayed today. The doctor said: 'Your patella measures 2.54 cm'. I said: 'Inch-high knees?' He said: '您的髌骨是2.54厘米高.' 3
mikeprice Posted November 8, 2022 Posted November 8, 2022 I had my leg X-rayed today. The doctor said: 'Your patella measures 2.54 cm'. I said: 'Inch-high knees?' He said: '您的髌骨是2.54厘米高.' That took me far to long!
Popular Post HarryMonkey Posted November 8, 2022 Popular Post Posted November 8, 2022 Sorry to moan on here, but I'm absolutely fed up with people whinging about the prices of things... £1.50 for tea, £1.75 for coffee, £2 for a slice of cake and £2.50 for parking… Any more complaints and honest to god I will stop inviting people to my house! 9
smurfomatic Posted November 9, 2022 Posted November 9, 2022 A priest, a pastor and a rabbit entered a clinic to donate blood. The nurse asked the rabbit: “what’s your blood type?” “I’m probably a type O”, said the rabbit. 1
Recommended Posts
Create an account or sign in to comment
You need to be a member in order to leave a comment
Create an account
Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!
Register a new accountSign in
Already have an account? Sign in here.
Sign In Now