unixman_again Posted August 31, 2017 Posted August 31, 2017 What do you call a man with a rabbit up his bum? Warren What do you call a man in a swimming pool, who has no arms and legs? Bob
GrumbleDook Posted August 31, 2017 Posted August 31, 2017 What do you call a blind stag? No idea. What do you call a blind stag with no legs? Still, no idea. What do you call a blind stag with no legs and no genitals? Still no f***ing idea!
6Foot2 Posted August 31, 2017 Author Posted August 31, 2017 What do you call a blind stag? No idea. What do you call a blind stag with no legs? Still, no idea. What do you call a blind stag with no legs and no genitals? Still no f***ing idea! For you @GrumbleDook: What do you call a man with no shins? Tony. 2
stevejp Posted September 1, 2017 Posted September 1, 2017 What do you call a man with a rabbit up his bum? Warren What do you call a man in a swimming pool, who has no arms and legs? Bob What do you call the fastest man in the swimming pool who has no arms and no legs? Clever Dick. 2
6Foot2 Posted September 2, 2017 Author Posted September 2, 2017 What do you call a bear with lacking an ear? B Also, what are bears without ears? Bees. 3
6Foot2 Posted September 10, 2017 Author Posted September 10, 2017 Link: https://twitter.com/JesseWittenrich/status/906882492992557056/photo/1 [Twitter Picture] Things you don't expect to find randomly sitting on a tree in the woods. I think there's a dad joke about a "log-on"somewhere here...
korifugi Posted September 11, 2017 Posted September 11, 2017 Link: https://twitter.com/JesseWittenrich/status/906882492992557056/photo/1 [Twitter Picture] Maybe they've heard setting up a trunk might increase interswitch speed. I'll see myself out 2
korifugi Posted September 20, 2017 Posted September 20, 2017 I quite like my ceiling. I mean it's not perfect - but it's up there... 1
6Foot2 Posted October 16, 2017 Author Posted October 16, 2017 Just got told that asking what people actually want is ridiculous and not being able to commit to a deadline of January to deliver "tablets" for teachers (which must run unspecified software) is unacceptable. I'm getting used to this planet now, but much prefer it back home on earth. send them all a pack of paracetamol Why are there no headache tablets in the jungle? Because the parrots-eat-em-all. 4
micktordoff Posted October 17, 2017 Posted October 17, 2017 (edited) Teacher : Knock Knock. Student : Whos there?. Teacher : To. Student : To Who?. Teacher : To Whom. Edited October 17, 2017 by micktordoff 3
Oddbod Posted October 20, 2017 Posted October 20, 2017 A man walks into a bar… ***BONG*** … it was an iron bar
djm968 Posted October 20, 2017 Posted October 20, 2017 The wife said she is leaving me due to my obsession with those TV shows about customs officers at Airports... as she was leaving the house I said..... "Did you pack those bags yourself?"
djm968 Posted October 20, 2017 Posted October 20, 2017 I went to the Doctor, I said Doctor I think I'm one of the chuckle brother, "can I be cured?" He said "that's up to you, to me, to you!"
Popular Post djm968 Posted October 20, 2017 Popular Post Posted October 20, 2017 So Batman came up to me and hit me over the head with a vase and said "T PAU!", I said "don't you mean KAPOW?" Batman said "No, I've got China in my hand" 7
Popular Post Poults Posted October 20, 2017 Popular Post Posted October 20, 2017 I went to the zoo the other day and the zoo keeper pointed me towards a baguette in a cage, he told me it was bread in captivity. 6
6Foot2 Posted October 30, 2017 Author Posted October 30, 2017 Did he get it from Charlie?Possibly. That remains to be S(h)een! [in a Sean Connery style]
6Foot2 Posted November 22, 2017 Author Posted November 22, 2017 When I went to the bank there was an old lady at the ATM. She asked me to check her balance, so I pushed her over. 1
korifugi Posted November 22, 2017 Posted November 22, 2017 When I went to the bank there was an old lady at the ATM. She asked me to check her balance, so I pushed her over. been a while since you posted to this thread? withdrawl symptoms? 1
NB9457 Posted November 22, 2017 Posted November 22, 2017 I'll never forget what my Grandad said to me before he kicked the bucket... "How far do you think I can kick this bucket?"
networkmangler Posted November 22, 2017 Posted November 22, 2017 I think the best one I came up with was when a facebook friend had put a picture of a bowl made out of leaves on facebook to show some arts and crafts type thing they had done with their daughters at rainbows. The comment I made was "That looks unbe-leaf-a bowl"
DalekSec Posted November 22, 2017 Posted November 22, 2017 My dads favorite one: Man 1: I just took my wife to the Caribbean Man 2: What Jamica? Man 1: No She went on her own accord!
Mewdewgooboofoo Posted November 23, 2017 Posted November 23, 2017 Whilst cooking today I accidentally rubbed some herbs in my eyes. I’m now parsley sighted. 2
DalekSec Posted November 23, 2017 Posted November 23, 2017 My missus told me i could make a bike out of spaghetti. You should of seen her face when i rode pasta 1
GuyJD Posted November 24, 2017 Posted November 24, 2017 My wife left me because I'm too insecure. No wait, she's back. She just went to make a cup of tea.
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