DalekSec Posted November 24, 2017 Posted November 24, 2017 Told my girlfriend she drew her eyebrows on wrong, She looked surprised.
6Foot2 Posted November 24, 2017 Author Posted November 24, 2017 Told my girlfriend she drew her eyebrows on wrong, She looked surprised. She's not the only one: Link: http://www.edugeek.net/forums/jokes-interweb-things/167807-dad-jokes-thread-2.html#post1602530
DalekSec Posted November 24, 2017 Posted November 24, 2017 She's not the only one: Link: http://www.edugeek.net/forums/jokes-interweb-things/167807-dad-jokes-thread-2.html#post1602530 [ATTACH=CONFIG]46364[/ATTACH] I told a joke @DaveP already said, I looked surprised 2
dry Posted December 11, 2017 Posted December 11, 2017 I struggled to get into my chocolate easter egg the other day. Eventually though, I cracked it. 1
6Foot2 Posted December 12, 2017 Author Posted December 12, 2017 The name's Bond, James Bond. And you are..? 1
6Foot2 Posted December 15, 2017 Author Posted December 15, 2017 A guy is caught by a ranger eating a Bald Eagle and is consequently put in jail for the crime. On the day of his trial, the conversation went something like this: Judge: "Do you know that eating a Bald Eagle is a federal offense?" Man: "Yes, I did. But if you let me argue my case, I'll explain what happened." Judge: "Proceed." Man: "I got lost in the woods. I hadn't had anything to eat for two weeks. I was so hungry. Next thing I see is a Bald Eagle swooping down at the lake for some fish. I knew that if I followed the eagle I could maybe steal the fish. Unfortunately, in the process of taking the fish I killed the eagle. I figured that since I killed the eagle I might as well eat it since it would be more disgraceful to let it rot on the ground." Judge: "The court will take a recess while we analyze your testimony." 15 minutes goes by and the judge returns. Judge: "Due to the extreme circumstance you were under and because you didn't intend to kill the eagle, the court will dismiss the charges. But if you don't mind the court asking, what does a Bald Eagle taste like?" Man: "Well, your honor, it is hard to explain. The best I can describe it is maybe kind of between a California Condor and a Spotted Owl." 1
djm968 Posted December 18, 2017 Posted December 18, 2017 Wonder if Hank Marvin, gets offered food every time he introduces himself. 2
6Foot2 Posted January 2, 2018 Author Posted January 2, 2018 Why did the poor man sell yeast? He wanted to raise some dough. 1
6Foot2 Posted January 5, 2018 Author Posted January 5, 2018 What do you call two ants that run away to get married? Ant-elopes.
smurfomatic Posted January 5, 2018 Posted January 5, 2018 What do you call two ants that run away to get married? Ant-elopes. Reminds me of how our physics teacher at school defined amplitude: Imagine and walking up the slope of the curve, eating some grass. By the time he gets to the top, he'll have amply chewed it...
saintoctopus Posted January 9, 2018 Posted January 9, 2018 I'm going to a deodorant party at the weekend... Roll on Saturday... 1
Mewdewgooboofoo Posted January 15, 2018 Posted January 15, 2018 What do we want? Race car noises! When do we want them? Neeeooowwwwwwww! 1
Mewdewgooboofoo Posted January 15, 2018 Posted January 15, 2018 One of my friends is a really stubborn hardcore raver. She keeps trying to make me rave with her. She just wont techno for an answer. - - - Updated - - - you didn't hear about the three big holes in the ground? Well, well, well. 1
Popular Post jdoyle Posted January 19, 2018 Popular Post Posted January 19, 2018 eldest son walked in a few minutes ago and asked myself and the wife who owns the SQL books downstairs and can he have a loan? Couldn't resist. Told him he could SELECT one from the TABLE. 7
6Foot2 Posted January 20, 2018 Author Posted January 20, 2018 What's better than a talking dog? A spelling bee!
Mewdewgooboofoo Posted January 22, 2018 Posted January 22, 2018 got the opportunity to use this one today in reply to when a member of staff used the Bob Marley printer joke in a ticket. "Topped up the paper, when i did it flashed a message saying “I just can’t get enough”. Turned out it was in Depeche Mode." 3
ICTLady Posted January 23, 2018 Posted January 23, 2018 I've got a new job in a chess piece factory. I'm on Knights this week. 4
korifugi Posted January 24, 2018 Posted January 24, 2018 I'm finding it really hard to join a group who shares ideas on making hats, scarves and jumpers. They're all so tightly knit. 1
6Foot2 Posted January 24, 2018 Author Posted January 24, 2018 Q: How would you cut an ocean in half? A: Not sure, but you could try a sea-saw. 1
hardtailstar Posted January 24, 2018 Posted January 24, 2018 Woman: How many times do you shave? Man: Between five and ten times a day. Woman: Why so many times? Man: Because im a barber. ----------------------------- Student: Miss, if I told you something can will you be annoyed? Teacher: No, what is it? Student: I didn't do my homework ----------------------------------- What's a pirates favourite shop? Arrrrrrrrrrrrgos. 1
6Foot2 Posted February 2, 2018 Author Posted February 2, 2018 Did you hear about the guy who invented Polos? He made a mint! 1
6Foot2 Posted February 2, 2018 Author Posted February 2, 2018 One of my friends is a really stubborn hardcore raver. She keeps trying to make me rave with her. She just wont techno for an answer. Link: https://twitter.com/ladbible/status/701895725349806080 [Twitter Picture Tweet] Posted previously here: Link: http://www.edugeek.net/forums/jokes-interweb-things/166498-oi-satellite-dish.html 2
Mewdewgooboofoo Posted February 5, 2018 Posted February 5, 2018 I was attacked last night in the street by a bloke with a power tool, there I was just minding my own business then BOSCH! 3
korifugi Posted February 5, 2018 Posted February 5, 2018 I was attacked last night in the street by a bloke with a power tool, there I was just minding my own business then BOSCH! My Workmate used to get that all the time... 2
6Foot2 Posted February 5, 2018 Author Posted February 5, 2018 I was attacked last night in the street by a bloke with a power tool, there I was just minding my own business then BOSCH! Alert! I need help! This is not a drill! 2
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