The Punny Thread

[6Foot2]

Link:

 

 

The filling inside a Kit-Kat bar is crushed up Kit-Kat bars which makes you wonder how the first Kit-Kat bar was ever made.

 

Easy: It was The Immaculate Confection.

 

 

Also: KitKats are so full of themselves!

 

[6Foot2]

Smart Ass!

 

Link: https://twitter.com/Awesome_planet_/status/817391079796391937 [Twitter video]

[sparkeh]

My three year old made her first pun today. I was asking what fruit she wanted in our next shop. And she said:

Daddy, don't you mean then 'fruiture' shop?

So, so proud

[mikeprice]

My three year old made her first pun today. I was asking what fruit she wanted in our next shop. And she said:

 

So, so proud

 

well done - her future looks secure

[Garacesh]

well done - her future looks secure

 

Don't you mean her fruiture?

[jdoyle]

My three year old made her first pun today. I was asking what fruit she wanted in our next shop. And she said:

 

So, so proud

 

aren't you going a bit bananas about the apple of your eye? Presumably the fruit were gathered using a Pun Net?

[korifugi]

My three year old made her first pun today. I was asking what fruit she wanted in our next shop. And she said:

 

So, so proud

 

So you now make puns as a pear?

[6Foot2]

Which blood group is an error?

.

.

.

.

.

.

Type O

 

[witch]

A positively dreadful pun

[mikeprice]

A positively dreadful pun

 

never mind 'get me coat' - you should make AB line for the door

[Boredguy]

Which blood group is an error?

.

.

.

.

.

.

Type O

 

Did you expect to get a negative reaction?

[6Foot2]

A positively dreadful pun

 

I wanted to B Positive but now I feel a clot.

[mikeprice]

A positively dreadful pun

 

Now now - don't 'B Negative'

 

- - - Updated - - -

 

Now now - don't 'B Negative'

 

Hmmm - bit late there

[jdoyle]

this thread is only for the vein :-)

 

and phlebs....

 

and the bloody minded ....

 

Edited January 16, 2017 by jdoyle

[korifugi]

Now we find out how many 'blood' jokes are in circulation - although aorta stay outta this.

[sted]

Now we find out how many 'blood' jokes are in circulation - although aorta stay outta this.

 

is your heart not in it anymore?

[DJ-1701]

Did you know that you can tell the gender of an ant by placing it in water?

 

If it floats... buoyant...

[mikeprice]

If he can swim he might be making his way to frants

[mikeprice]

You have to be careful with ants in your house

 

if 8 ants move in they are just squatters

but if 2 more move in they become tenants

[DJ-1701]

You have to be careful with ants in your house

 

if 8 ants move in they are just squatters

but if 2 more move in they become tenants

 

Is the tenth one called David?

[6Foot2]

You have to be careful with ants in your house

 

if 8 ants move in they are just squatters

but if 2 more move in they become tenants

 

Don't be surprised when they do move in if you find one of them is good with numbers and money.

 

That will be The A-Count Ant.

[korifugi]

With that many ants - you could always hire one to look after the needs of all the others.

 

It'll be an Attend-Ant

[6Foot2]

You can be sure that there will be another one along shortly: Expect-Ant.

[Garacesh]

You can be sure that there will be another one along shortly: Expect-Ant.

 

And when they show up, how do they arrive? By using a Propell-Ant

[korifugi]

Well just make sure all their young attend school - there's usually one defi-ant one that insists on playing tru-ant.