Grooms Speech - HELP!!!!

[Garacesh]

"And although this is the happiest day of my life, as clichéd as it is, there is always one part I'm going to regret, I feel, for the rest of my life.. And that's handing the microphone over to this guy.. I give you - the Best Man!"

[Danp]

What did you do?

 

I have a no speech wedding is what I did. I don't like giving speeches and neither does my best man. Also, I knew my FIL would be pissed so thought it's best to knock it all on the head right from the start.

[Modey]

Some good advice on here so far. Keep it short and sweet and do all the usual thanking etc.. If jokes come naturally to you, throw a couple of light hearted ones in. Doesn't matter if they are cheesy, it's your wedding and you'll have a sympathetic audience. Hope it goes well, and have a great day!

[Iain.Faulkner]

Mine was 14 months ago, and it was the bit I was most nervous about during the whole day. I spent weeks writing, re-writing and even had one of the bridesmaids read it for me to make sure I wasn't doing anything stupid.

 

At the end of the day, your speech isn't the one people are putting pressure on to be funny, that's the best man's job. However putting in a couple of little jokes won't hurt and this may be the only opportunity you'll ever have to get a laugh from a room full of people (it certainly was for me). Ultimately, the guests all want you to do well and are willing you to give a good speech.

 

As people have said before though, groom's speeches seem to follow a fairly set order.....

 

- Thank the father in law for his speech and welcoming you into the family.

- Thank everyone for coming ("on behalf of my wife and I" always gets a cheer), make special mention of those who have travelled a significant distance to be there.

- Thank the in laws for raising such a wonderful daughter, suck up to them at this point :-) - flowers to Mother in law, I told guests what an amazing cook my mother in law is (and she genuinely is) and that they had to try the fruit cake in the wedding cake as she'd made it from a secret family recipe.

- Thank your parents - flowers to your Mum

- Thank people who had specific roles in the wedding - readings (mention how well they were read) give flowers, ushers - give presents, I thanked the man who loaned us his VW Campervan and acted as driver and gave him a bottle of wine, the woman who made our wedding cake was thanked and given flowers.

- Thank the bride, tell her how beautiful she is (She will look incredible, I was completely blown away), tell her how wonderful she is, I gave a quick history of how we met etc.

- Thank the bridesmaids - tell them how amazing they look etc - give flowers etc

- Thank the best man/men tell the guests what a liar he is and that they shouldn't believe anything he/they say.

 

With our wedding, I was not only becoming a husband, but also a step dad. The bit of my speech that got the tears flowing (I got the wife, the mother in law, my mum and my wife's work colleagues with this bit) was where I gave special mention to my step children, telling them how wonderful they were, and how grateful I was that they had accepted me into their lives (I also gave them presents just from me) and how I hoped to help them become the wonderful adults I am sure they will become.

 

Hope this is of some use, I think I managed to squeeze all that into about 5 minutes, and if it's of any use to you I can send you across a copy of my speech for you to look at?

[sparkeh]

Oh by the way, congrats and good luck for the big day!

[sonofsanta]

The groom's speech is the easiest. You've had all the advice you need above - just say Thank Yous. And remember to KISS.

 

Keep It Simple, Stupid.

 

Don't forget to raise a glass to absent friends either - be they people too far to travel, or people who have passed away (in which case, I named them - there were only two or three family members to list though).

 

IIRC we got gifts for parents, bridesmaids and best man. Buggered if I can remember what any of them were except the latter - engraved pewter beer mug

 

EDIT: and congratulations, of course! Matt's Top Tip for the day: try and take a few minutes out every now and then to sit down with your wife and just watch what's going on. It's all too easy to spend all your time mingling and feeling like you have to talk to everyone, to the point where you don't get to enjoy your wedding as much as everyone else and you don't actually see your new wife.

 

With our wedding, I was not only becoming a husband, but also a step dad. The bit of my speech that got the tears flowing (I got the wife, the mother in law, my mum and my wife's work colleagues with this bit) was where I gave special mention to my step children, telling them how wonderful they were, and how grateful I was that they had accepted me into their lives (I also gave them presents just from me) and how I hoped to help them become the wonderful adults I am sure they will become.

 

Likewise - and we'd had the name change timed specifically, so I used my groom's speech to announce that my wife wasn't the only person taking on my family name that day. I think every female relative cried at that point.

Edited June 5, 2013 by sonofsanta

[Willott]

Bullet points on a card, written the night before at about 11pm (when you remember you've forgotten to write it), wing it.

 

Think I got away with it, I would definitely use the "wife and I" bit. From what I remember, you echo the father of the bride in thanking everyone for coming, thank your new wife for "making you the happiest man in the world" or whatever other soppy phrase occurs, thank those who've helped with bits from the wedding. Nail your best man to the wall beforehand, or get him plastered so he can't speak (or threaten him with his wedding day if it's likely to occur) - also, don't drink too much before your speech. The best man should thank the bridesmaids as part of their speech iirc, but I'd thank them as part of yours anyway - better to thank everyone than miss someone because you think someone else is going to thank them.

 

And be yourself - sell things to people (if someone made something for you for the wedding, offer their services, taking a small percentage margin for yourself).

 

Good luck

 

In all honesty, no one* really cares about what you say, they're there to enjoy celebrating your commitment to your new wife

 

Cheers

 

Will

 

*this may not include your wife, your parents and her parents.

[nullensc]

You could always sing it...

 

[fiza]

@Millgate - Congratulations in advance for the big day. Hope you are not planning a long honeymoon!!! You have my EES renewal to sort out!!! Just kidding (I'm not!!). Enjoy your big day.

[ICTLady]

Two things to remember:

 

You're amongst friends (most of whom will have had a few drinks). They're on your side. If you crack a joke, they'll laugh. If you say something soppy, they'll say "aah" and get teary. Don't worry too much about getting it right or being perfect - whatever you say will be appreciated. The important thing is not to forget to thank anyone and not to forget to say how wonderful your new wife is!

 

And second thing, grammar. "My wife and I would like to thank you....." = correct. "On behalf of me and my beautiful wife, I'd like to thank you...." = correct. "On behalf of my wife and I, thank you all....." = INCORRECT. Horrible pedants like me will be horrified

 

Best of luck for the big day and for the many happy years to follow.

[nikaso]

 

"On behalf of me and my beautiful wife, I'd like to thank you...." = correct.

 

 

That sounds wrong in my head, but then a lot of things do!

 

Have a great day anyway and enjoy it!

[soveryapt]

Wow.. Congratulations first off!

 

For my speech I went for a couple of geeky Mac Fan Boy gags (as everyone knows I am one) for instance, I started by saying "So, apparently this is the point when I'm to give some kind of speech. I have to be honest with you, I only found out about half an hour ago, but then I remembered that great advertising slogan, and sure enough, there's an app for it" cue pulling out my iPhone and making a couple of purposeful gaffs in a Ron Burgandy reading whats on the prompt styley (though not the sweary types, just daft things and a few in jokes amongst friends) - then got on with what everyone else has already said, all the thank you messages, how beautiful everyone looks, gifts, etc.

 

Whilst the best mans speech is traditionally the funny one (and my best man did do a very good job of that) there's nothing in the rule books that say you can't make a couple of quips too. It's whatever you feel most natural doing. If you're more of a joke about kind of guy, then make the odd joke at the start and such, if you're more a serious dude, then don't - just don't forget all the thank yous and don't show up your best man if you are going to throw a few gags in.

[RTFM]

Be yourself Luke and your new bride will love it.

 

You dont know Luke too well, she still has time to come to her senses!

 

On a more serious note, my speech was terrible but essentially you want to comment on your new wife (say nice things), do your thank you's to everyone for coming, your wife for agreeing to marry you (you need a big thank you for that one), your parents, everyone involved in the wedding (and give out gifts if thats what your doing), the hotel staff etc. Couple of small jokes, you could comment on whoeever is speaking next, probably your best man, and ramp up the pressure for him etc

 

I'm sure it'll be fine, though personally i hope you muck it up!

Edited June 10, 2013 by RTFM