[joke] Cruise Complaint

[sippo]

Our happy event at sea. 5 of 14 people found this review informative

 

Reviewed By: angry, essex on 5th Dec 2010

Cruise Line: Royal Caribbean Cruises Times cruised before: 0

Cruise Ship: Independence of the Seas Sailed: November, 2010

Destination: Mediterranean Age: 18-25

Cabin: Outside Occasion: Family holiday

 

Hi everyone. My bird and me have just got back from a cruze on iotc.s and I aint happy. my girl was a bit stressed as we were expecting our 1st kid anytime now so iI decided to treet here to a brake and this seamed like the perfect tonic that she neaded. When we boarded I could not help the staff staring at the big bulge in her stomach and asking if the baby woz due soon at witch I told them to keep there big nozes out of our business. We had an inside cabin as there were only four of us my mum her mum and us too. When we got our cases one woz broke so I got strait on two reception two complain but they didnt want two no not a good start I thought. Anyway I didnt want to spoil our little brake so I emailed social services from my new iphone who said they would send one on two our first port of call and it would be waiting four us when we got there what a relief. On our first night my bird woke me saying that she woz having contraptions and I would have to call a midwife so I called reseption who said they never had one I said what? on a boat this big you must be having a laugh. Lucky my mum woz with us as she woz able to safely deliver the kid as she and my dad have 19 of there own so she nose the ropes. What a joyous ocations this woz and we agread that we we call the little lad indy after the character of a the film we saw once. After a visit to the medical center witch they had the nurve to try and charge us four we set off to enjoy the rest of our brake as we naturally assumed that they would look after the kid as we were two stressed to take on that kind of responsability mums included but this wasnt to be the case. Firstly to kick things off I went two recepsion two cash my gyro but they flatly refused saying that it woz not possible and I would have two pay on my credit card for what I drank and so on but seeings my card woz up to the hilt in debt I said no way hozay. Next thing my bird came to me in teers telling me that the shop never sold baby clothes nappys or anything so I demanded to speek to the Captain buy they said he woz two busy steering the boat I told them sorry I should have nown that. After this the sea got ruff and the rest of the cruze we spent being sick as medical reception refuzed us help as I hadnot settled the previous bill what a nurve. We have decided that cruzing is not four us and we will from now on stick to holidays with our feat on terror furma. Goodbye.

[Fatmas]

Could be Essex or Swindon mate based on the writing style

[jamesfed]

Real or made up?

[creese]

Real or made up?

 

Good either way. I've only managed the first 2 sentences.

[jamesfed]

Good either way. I've only managed the first 2 sentences.

 

No doubt there Problem is I know people like this and can see this happening allll to easily!

[Guest Guest]

My head hurts

[solitaire89]

Got to be a fake - they won't let you on a cruise ship if there's any chance of you dropping a sprog whilst onboard... Funny anyway though!

[MK-2]

how sad is it that i read through that perfectly. i could see all the mistakes, but read through it fine.

[Guest Guest]

how sad is it that i read through that perfectly. i could see all the mistakes, but read through it fine.

 

u iz from Nottingham

[MK-2]

u iz from Nottingham

 

I'll have you know dear boy that I am in fact from London, I merely have my abode in Nottingham..........actually yeah good point, still valid