Fatmas

"Jesus Christ, see you, you are a ******* omni-shambles, that's what you are. You're like that coffee machine, you know, From bean to cup, you **** up." - Classic.

Everybody said their piece, and now the boss has spoken. So we are all scared in case we get a Malcolm Tucker esque dressing down.

The car example is completely different. I've put hundreds of pounds into NoFX and many other bands over the years, I don't think I should be considered a "thief" for downloading one of their albums. Granted they are well established. For you guys gigging just so you know, I'm the guy who will go to a gig and buy EP's and Tshirts from the lesser known support bands, because let's be honest, you guys usually need the cash more than the headliners! If I like the EP, chances are I'll buy the album when it's released.

Agreed, the logic of shutting down Torrent searching sites is similar to shutting down Google because you can search for illegal pornography. You can even search for Torrents in Google!

This has probably been said already but here is my opinion: The key flaw in copyright/piracy law is that the Government believes 1 "illegal" download = 1 lost sale. That's simply not the case. If I downloaded US TV shows and then found I couldn't anymore I wouldn't go out and buy them all on DVD, I would probably just not watch them. The creators are not losing anything. Another Example: I like NOFX. I have bought many of their albums (Approx £10 each for sake of argument) and have seem them live maybe 4 times (£25 each). Yet if I were to download an old album or maybe their latest one I would be considered a thief and could be prosecuted. That just doesn't make any sense. I cannot find the source but many studies have shown that people who so called "pirate" music/films/games etc... actually spend more money purchasing this media legally than people who don't. The pricing system and structure of the entire media industry is broken. Almost to the end of my scattered thoughts: Why should I risk paying between £10-15 for an album I might not like? If I like it I will generally buy it or at least buy the other albums and/or future albums by that artist. I really don't think "Piracy" is hurting the music/film/TV/game industry. For musicians: Get out there and play gigs, distribute your music for very cheap or use Trent Reznor's model; let people pay what they want for your music. If it's too tough for you I'm not being funny but maybe you are in the wrong business? /End Rant :-)

A few of them this week: Did you hear about the farmer who won the Nobel Prize? He was out standing in his field. An Englishman, a Frenchman, a Spaniard and a German are all standing watching a street performer do some excellent juggling. The juggler notices that the four gentlemen have a very poor view, so he stands up on a large wooden box and calls out, "Can you all see me now?" "Yes." "Oui." "Sí." "Ja." I got an e-mail saying 'At Google Earth we can read maps backwards!' I thought, "That's just spam." When Beethoven passed away, he was buried in a churchyard. A couple days later, the town drunk was walking through the cemetery and heard some strange noise coming from the area where Beethoven was buried. Terrified, the drunk ran and got the priest to come and listen to it. The priest bent close to the grave and heard some faint, unrecognizable music coming from the grave. Frightened, the priest ran and got the town magistrate. When the magistrate arrived, he bent his ear to the grave, listened for a moment, and said, "Ah, yes, that's Beethoven's Ninth Symphony, being played backwards." He listened a while longer, and said, "There's the Eighth Symphony, and it's backwards, too. Most puzzling." So the magistrate kept listening; "There's the Seventh... the Sixth... the Fifth..." Suddenly the realization of what was happening dawned on the magistrate; he stood up and announced to the crowd that had gathered in the cemetery, "My fellow citizens, there's nothing to worry about. It's just Beethoven decomposing."

It has been a long time since my last post. Moving house is the worst.

He was probably hitting himself.

I'm back after a long hiatus of moving to Oxford. Gaddafi once had it all and slowly watched his empire crumble. The trusted has fled to the opposition and his defence has collapsed... now the world is laughing at you. Sorry, did I say Gaddafi? I meant Wenger. Will Gadaffi be found in his home town? I think it's a dead Sirte BOOM. That's right, I am topical.

Fluoride watch these bad puns if I were you!

I'm not in Education any more, I moved to the Private sector back in April. I'm joking about the spelling errors, I have to triple check everything I type normally!

If there wasn't a pun thread at the end of the week, what would users sink their teeth into?

Also it might be worth checking for glaring spelling and grammar errors. I kid I kid.

I'm going to brush that off.

Some of these jokes are getting on my nerves, but I will brace myself for more.