6Foot2 Posted May 1, 2015 Posted May 1, 2015 Have you walked 500 miles? Have you been advised to walk 500 more? You may be entitled to compensation. Call The Proclaimers!
Gatt Posted May 1, 2015 Posted May 1, 2015 Have you walked 500 miles? Have you been advised to walk 500 more? You may be entitled to compensation. Call The Proclaimers! But they'd just tell me that I'd be the man to fall down at your door...
howartp Posted May 1, 2015 Posted May 1, 2015 Teacher says to class, "Can anyone give me a Sentence with the letter I in?" Little Jonny stands up and says "I is.." "No Jonny" interrupts the teacher. "It is always I am not I is." "Ok," replies Jonny "I is the 9th letter of the Alphabet" You've copied/typed that wrong, or the original is wrong. Last line should be "Ok, I am the 9th letter of the alphabet".
LeightonJames Posted May 1, 2015 Posted May 1, 2015 Yeah, whoops. Typed it out and my brain obviously took over and made it make sense automatically.
unixman_again Posted May 1, 2015 Author Posted May 1, 2015 Have you walked 500 miles? Have you been advised to walk 500 more? You may be entitled to compensation. Call The Proclaimers! You seem to have forgotten to credit Sickipedia.org 1
Tesla Posted May 1, 2015 Posted May 1, 2015 My girlfriend accused me of being a transvestite, so I packed her things and left.
6Foot2 Posted May 1, 2015 Posted May 1, 2015 (edited) You seem to have forgotten to credit Sickipedia.org That isn't where I heard it this morning. It was told to me in the office by a colleague. I have just done a search for Sickipedia.org so that I could find a link for the joke and post credit but that website is blocked by our LEA. Edit: Alternate credit: Link: https://twitter.com/vinyltap1/status/593720398396661760/photo/1 Edited May 1, 2015 by 6Foot2 1
mdrabble Posted May 1, 2015 Posted May 1, 2015 Teachers asked Little Jonny to give her a sentence with the word "Centimetre" Jonny replied, my little sister finished nursery early and I was Sent to Meet Her
Jawloms Posted May 1, 2015 Posted May 1, 2015 (edited) Teacher asked Little Jonny to give her a sentence with the word "Judicious" Jonny replied, hands that judicious can feel soft as your face Edited May 1, 2015 by Jawloms
Ketlane Posted May 1, 2015 Posted May 1, 2015 How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb? Fish 1
Gatt Posted May 8, 2015 Posted May 8, 2015 What did the mother buffalo say when her boy left for college? Bye-son
unixman_again Posted May 9, 2015 Author Posted May 9, 2015 What's the difference between a buffalo and a bison? You can't wash your hands in a buffalo. What succeeds in life? A budgie with no teeth.
Garacesh Posted May 11, 2015 Posted May 11, 2015 An Englishman, an African man and a Mexican man walk into a bar. None of them are racist, so they have a drink together and are merry. I much prefer silly anti-jokes
witch Posted May 11, 2015 Posted May 11, 2015 What did the man say when he saw a herd of elephants coming over the hill? "oh look, there's a herd of elephants coming over the hill" What did the man say when he saw a herd of elephants wearing sunglasses coming over the hill? Nothing. He didn't recognise them
6Foot2 Posted May 11, 2015 Posted May 11, 2015 How do you make a venetian blind? Poke his eyes out! Did you know that if it wasn't for venetian blinds it would be curtains for us all?
Ketlane Posted May 11, 2015 Posted May 11, 2015 Elephant walks into a bar and orders a pint. Barman says, "We don't get many elephants in here." Elephant replies, "No wonder at these prices."
unixman_again Posted June 3, 2015 Author Posted June 3, 2015 There are 400 billion birds in the world, 250,000 planes, but only one Superman. So, in answer to your question ... It's probably a bird. Courtesy of Sickipedia.org
tech_guy Posted June 3, 2015 Posted June 3, 2015 (edited) I hear there's a new ride at Alton Towers.... It's called The Air Ambulance.... Courtesy sickipedia.org Edited June 3, 2015 by tech_guy
Gatt Posted June 3, 2015 Posted June 3, 2015 I hear there's a new ride at Alton Towers.... It's called The Air Ambulance.... Courtesy sickipedia.org Too Soon.. 1
pcstru Posted June 3, 2015 Posted June 3, 2015 I was trying to explain puns to my friend, a kleptomaniac. It turned out to be impossible, she takes everything literally.
andyace Posted June 3, 2015 Posted June 3, 2015 Why have Giraffes got long necks? Cause their heads are so far from their bodies - - - Updated - - - Whats Brown And Sticky A stick!!
pcstru Posted June 3, 2015 Posted June 3, 2015 @andyace - stealthy delurk or do the stats show "Posts : 1" on the second post?
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