More to eating sweets than you know!

[alexknight]

Whenever I get a packet of M&Ms, I make it my duty to continue the strength and robustness of the sweet as a species. To this end, I hold M&M duels.

 

Taking two sweets between my thumb and forefinger, I apply pressure, squeezing them together until one of them cracks and splinters. That is the "loser," and I eat the inferior one immediately. The winner gets to go another round.

 

I have found that, in general, the brown and red M&Ms are tougher, and the newer blue ones are genetically inferior. I have hypothesised that the blue M&Ms as a race cannot survive long in the intense theatre of competition that is the modern sweet and snack-food world.

 

Occasionally I will get a mutation, a sweet that is misshapen, or pointier, or flatter than the rest. Almost invariably this proves to be a weakness, but on very rare occasions it gives the sweet extra strength. In this way, the species continues to adapt to its environment.

 

When I reach the end of the pack, I am left with one M&M, the strongest of the herd. Since it would make no sense to eat this one as well, I pack it neatly in an envelope and send it to M&M Mars, A Division of Mars, Inc., along with a 3x5 card reading, "Please use this M&M for breeding purposes."

 

This week they wrote back to thank me, and sent me a coupon for a free 1/2 pound bag of M&Ms. I consider this "grant/research money." I have set aside the weekend for a grand tournament. From a field of hundreds, we will discover the True Champion.

 

There can be only one!!

 

What worries me is i'm wondering if there is a preferred ambient temperature to conduct these experiments?

 

Alex

[plugged_in]

eh you have posted this twice

[alexknight]

Sorry

 

I had sticky fingers.

[plugged_in]

your mad!! i have sent you a PM

[_Bat_]

So THAT is what ICT Technicians do all day

[localzuk]

I think it must be something in the water down here!!!

[Lee_K_81]

When I reach the end of the pack, I am left with one M&M, the strongest of the herd. Since it would make no sense to eat this one as well, I pack it neatly in an envelope and send it to M&M Mars, A Division of Mars, Inc., along with a 3x5 card reading, "Please use this M&M for breeding purposes."

 

The final one might not actually be the strongest. If M&M:1 went through 20 other M&M's it might get beaten by M&M:22, which may have been weaker than all of the previous M&Ms but took advantage of the wear and tear M&M:1 took from M&M's:2-21 - or does being a lucky M&M consitute having good characteristics to carry forth in to the next generation.

 

Out of interest, do you use the choc M&Ms or the peanut M&M's? Which is stronger? We all know from the ad's that the red choc one is the cleaverest.... is this taken in to account in your study (perhaps being cleaver enough to avoid being picked until last and getting a cheap shot against the bigger badder M&M)

 

it's the whole Lennie and George thing really...... now where's that alphalpha for the wabbits.

[alexknight]

I am a little concerned as summer is coming and it may effect my experiment. I am not quite sure what temperature to cool them too for optimum strength?

 

Any ideas would be appreciated.

 

Alex

[Lee_K_81]

Does your server room have air con. That should provide a good room temp. Just be careful not to get chocolate in your domain controller!

[alexknight]

When I reach the end of the pack, I am left with one M&M, the strongest of the herd. Since it would make no sense to eat this one as well, I pack it neatly in an envelope and send it to M&M Mars, A Division of Mars, Inc., along with a 3x5 card reading, "Please use this M&M for breeding purposes."

 

The final one might not actually be the strongest. If M&M:1 went through 20 other M&M's it might get beaten by M&M:22, which may have been weaker than all of the previous M&Ms but took advantage of the wear and tear M&M:1 took from M&M's:2-21 - or does being a lucky M&M consitute having good characteristics to carry forth in to the next generation.

 

Out of interest, do you use the choc M&Ms or the peanut M&M's? Which is stronger? We all know from the ad's that the red choc one is the cleaverest.... is this taken in to account in your study (perhaps being cleaver enough to avoid being picked until last and getting a cheap shot against the bigger badder M&M)

 

it's the whole Lennie and George thing really...... now where's that alphalpha for the wabbits.

 

You do have a point and one that I have thought about long and hard. That is the reason i sent the strongest/last one back. If we all did that then we would be able to run an ongoing test to see if the MM's indeed did become stronger.

 

I of course use the peanut MM's as you do have to have some sense of proportion, this is the real world of course and there is an abundance of nuts about.

 

I will have to try and use just one colour agianst all the other colours and go from there.

 

Alex

[Lee_K_81]

It might also be interesting to put a peanut M&M up against a chocolate covered brazil nut. It would be interesting to see if the crispy sugarcoated shell gives an advantage, and then we can finally crown M&Ms as the king of nut coated confectionary

[gwendes]

A friend of mine got us two free crates of RedBull with this poem:

(slightly off thread topic I know but it just shows how easy it is to please PR!)

 

Sonnet for an absent friend...

Oh when you are with me I can but smile -

My lips curl upward in unmuted joy,

My lifelong hopes are put on hold a while.

All other tastes and scents can but annoy

My senses, all alive to your embrace

Of freedom tinged with mem'ries lost before

I first knew you. Before your wings of lace

Did carry me away - Oh I implore

The gods, nay, one - just Bacchus - only he

Can speed your journey and make swift your flight

That better may you soon return to me

And calm me in my lonely, you-less plight.

For every night when hated slumber stings

I dream of your return, my precious wings.

 

She is teaching in Japan atm where Redbull is not so easy to find!

[tom_newton]

Gnnn... Balls... is it friday already? Oh wait, no it's Thursday! Wake me up for tha weekend

 

(Actually I spent 10 mins today unsuccesfully trying to buy fun-size crunchies online)

 

Tom