Your worst gaming performance?

[synaesthesia]

Quake 2. We were in a "fun" team and we didn't particularly bother with tactics, map or item control etc. We were quite decently skilled between us though and got quite far into a tournament/league (online). We were drawn against one of the UK's best Q2 clans so decided we'd spend the entire 15 minute round spinning on the spot and spamming "Moooooooooo!"

[Garacesh]

Quake 2. We were in a "fun" team and we didn't particularly bother with tactics, map or item control etc. We were quite decently skilled between us though and got quite far into a tournament/league (online). We were drawn against one of the UK's best Q2 clans so decided we'd spend the entire 15 minute round spinning on the spot and spamming "Moooooooooo!"

 

Sounds like when I used to play MoH:AA.. We were a fairly decent group, came top of a few small-time leagues every now and again, but then got drafted against a massive bunch of tryhards that would spend hours practising the perfect grenade-rebound shots and stuff.. So we all just charged in like any group of Indians from any wild west film ever.. Actually went in our favour for the first few rounds but then they clocked on and we started getting creamed so we just did other stupid stuff all game like trying to pistol whip them, or binding a key to suicide and pressing it as soon as one of them so much as breathed in our general direction.

 

Fun match. Got us kicked out of that league, but fun match.

[DMcGuigan]

Agreed. I managed to get to 21, once. Then every other game ended after about 4.

 

I can get fairly reliable 150+ scores, ended at about 206. Now Flappy Droid, the Android easter egg on the other hand.. I'm lucky to get to 2.

[CAM]

/6char

[LosOjos]

GTA:VC - expertly jumping from a car that was on fire, only for the driverless car to hit a wall, bounce off and come back, run me over, then stop over me as it burned. It then blew up, killing me. I laughed, a lot.

 

Gah, Vice City. I think I parked more cars in those canals than there are trolleys in ours.

[X-13]

Gah, Vice City. I think I parked more cars in those canals than there are trolleys in ours.

 

I'm pretty sure, if there was object permanence, I could have used the cars I drove into the sea as an alternative bridge in GTA:SA and GTA4...

[korova_blue]

Not being able to complete the tutorial on Tomb Raider. And I tried for hours..... I can still hear Lara Croft's voice in my head now 'that's no good, back to the start'... 'press the action button to make me jump' etc etc...

[Mako]

This is going back a bit. Medal of Honor: Allied Assault.

 

I ran a clan and regularly conducted 1v1 try outs. As a joke, a friend-of-a-friend was put online to play. Guy had never touched a PC in his life, I spent most of the 'match' following him as he was either staring at the sky, the floor or running into walls.

 

At the point where I decided to actually play, he was carrying a bazooka. He managed to backpedal out of a hole in the wall of a 3rd story building, knowing the fall wouldn't kill I dived after him, guns blazing. There's no way he'll kill me.

I managed to miss every shot and hit the deck in front of him. He was still staring at the floor. His guy never moved, never flinched. He fired the bazooka, it killed me but he lived.

 

To this day I still hear of "the day Craig owned me", which is why it'll forever be my greatest fail.

[Garacesh]

This is going back a bit. Medal of Honor: Allied Assault.

 

I ran a clan and regularly conducted 1v1 try outs. As a joke, a friend-of-a-friend was put online to play. Guy had never touched a PC in his life, I spent most of the 'match' following him as he was either staring at the sky, the floor or running into walls.

 

At the point where I decided to actually play, he was carrying a bazooka. He managed to backpedal out of a hole in the wall of a 3rd story building, knowing the fall wouldn't kill I dived after him, guns blazing. There's no way he'll kill me.

I managed to miss every shot and hit the deck in front of him. He was still staring at the floor. His guy never moved, never flinched. He fired the bazooka, it killed me but he lived.

 

To this day I still hear of "the day Craig owned me", which is why it'll forever be my greatest fail.

HA! The noob tubes were so buggy in that game. Probably part of the reason 'no shotgun/rockets' servers got so popular (also they were cheap weapons to use)

[sparkeh]

GTA seems to give you great opportunities for awesome fails.

 

Last night: cornered a van I was supposed to destroy, ran to a safe distance and lobbed a grenade which rebounded off the bumper and landed at my feet. BOOM! Wasted

[Grey-gear]

Think the worst I had was in SWKOR online as I pulled to may mobs at once kill the whole team.

[DalekSec]

Think the worst I had was in SWKOR online as I pulled to may mobs at once kill the whole team.

 

God damn it leroy

[Grey-gear]

God damn it leroy

 

That's what the others said as well

[Boredguy]

This is going back a bit. Medal of Honor: Allied Assault.

 

At the point where I decided to actually play, he was carrying a bazooka. He managed to backpedal out of a hole in the wall of a 3rd story building, knowing the fall wouldn't kill I dived after him, guns blazing. There's no way he'll kill me.

I managed to miss every shot and hit the deck in front of him. He was still staring at the floor. His guy never moved, never flinched. He fired the bazooka, it killed me but he lived.

 

 

Ah the Stalingrad map I believe that might of been. Best map there was for bazooka and shotguns

 

 

In H1Z1 I've been known to not see a tiny bump in the road, grass or even a street sign and flip and blow up one of the cars all 4 of us were in

[Mako]

Ah the Stalingrad map I believe that might of been. Best map there was for bazooka and shotguns

 

It was indeed Stalingrad. Well remembered, sir. The hole in the wall at the top of many flights of stairs.

[Boredguy]

Used to enjoy jumping out of that window in matches, or running along the narrow ledge on the opposite building.

 

However many a match point was lost by a misplaced nade not landing where it should do and killing the team members.

[DalekSec]

Not me but the guy I was playing with. Playing Fifa 15 I do a great ball to my mate who's got an open goal keeper no where in sight . He does a few tricks acts cocky and then from 2 yards out on an open goal misses to the right of the posts when he was stood by the left post. What followed was 2 minutes of dead silence followed 10minutes of laughter, we still mention it every day and to everyone I meet on Fifa

[Garacesh]

It was indeed Stalingrad. Well remembered, sir. The hole in the wall at the top of many flights of stairs.

With the tiny little plank to cross to the next building.

 

Stalingrad was a great map. Unfortunately most leagues were focussed on AS- not TDM- (I don't remember the actual acronyms so I'm going to use the unreal tournament names )

V2 Rocket Facility was an especially popular one.. Alongside the one with the church and the one with the bridge.. And no league actually let you choose Omaha Beach xD

[Boredguy]

Ah Remagen was fun with the bridge,

Destroyed village with the church was fun as we managed to perfect the "nade over the building" throw, and getting it into the church bell tower from behind the wall... those were the days.

[Garacesh]

Algiers was a pretty good map, too. One of the ones we usually picked on the rare occurrence the league was a TDM league

[tmcd35]

This is going back a bit. Medal of Honor: Allied Assault.

 

Ah the Stalingrad map I believe that might of been. Best map there was for bazooka and shotguns

 

Stalingrad! Ah, the memories. I used to use a sniper rifle (as I did on most maps) and try to find a hide-y hole somewhere to pick off all the wannabes who tried taking the machine gun at the far end of the court yard. Unfortunately I be concentrating too much on my sneaky sniping that someone would inevitable creep up on me and stab me in the back

 

My favourite map was one we called "the clock tower". Ruined building on one side and church in the middle of a field. A good capture the flag game where the goal was always to capture and hold the clock tower. Once you got it you stood over the hatch in the floor and used bazookas or grenades to explode anyone foolish enough to come up the ladder

 

Played many a LAN party with that game back 'in the day'. I got disengaged when everyone moved on to Battlefield 1942 and I found my physical nausea for FPS's was getting worse.

[Garacesh]

My favourite map was one we called "the clock tower". Ruined building on one side and church in the middle of a field. A good capture the flag game where the goal was always to capture and hold the clock tower. Once you got it you stood over the hatch in the floor and used bazookas or grenades to explode anyone foolish enough to come up the ladder

Nah, just throw a couple of 'nades up into the roof and shoot whoever tries to scarper down the ladder. Clock tower is now yours. I find it pretty cool, looking back on it, that that map would always - always - end up an impromptu KotH game

[Boredguy]

Not to mention the unspoken rule when it was down to 1v1, one of you would fire your pistol into the air and you'd meet up and pistol whip each other to see which side won...

 

I hate to think now how much money we spent on running the servers for games like MOH (both AA and SH), BF1942, RavenShield each year as Jolt used to charge around £160 a month for their top end kit.. but the fun we had.

[tmcd35]

I hate to think now how much money we spent on running the servers for games like MOH (both AA and SH), BF1942, RavenShield each year as Jolt used to charge around £160 a month for their top end kit..

 

I was working for PC-World (sorry for swearing mods) at the time. I think they had a good racket going. As fast as they were paying us our wages, they were taking the money back again for brown box OEM component upgrades for our rigs. I think I changed GPU 3 times in a six month period at one point! (Then I bought an original XBox on launch and realised PC gaming was for losers (aka, consoles are cheaper)).

[Mako]

I rented a server from a 'company' called Shock Pulse Gaming. £10 a month for a 24 slot server. I figured out it was a couple of Scottish brothers with a serious set of gear in their basement, performed just as well as anything from the major server hosting companies. I used to mail them cash, worked great. They 'went out of business' just before I stopped playing. No trace of them now.

 

Was anyone a keybinding noob? I went through a spell of binding lean-left and lean-right to strafe-left and strafe-right, before I was banned from servers, and then bound them to Q and E instead. Legit keyboard skills, yo. That's when I started to be proficient in rifling, moving on from sniping.

 

More on-topic, I find my worst gaming performances to be nightly now... damn League of Legends. .