X-13 Posted October 16, 2013 Posted October 16, 2013 Oooo... seeing as how we haven't moved on from telling jokes: This is the Stock2ber thread. It's all jokes, all the time. 1
VeryPC Posted October 16, 2013 Author Posted October 16, 2013 Oooo... seeing as how we haven't moved on from telling jokes: There are 2 types of people in the world. Those who can extrapolate from incomplete data and. Bonus locked! 1
VeryPC Posted October 16, 2013 Author Posted October 16, 2013 This is the Stock2ber thread. It's all jokes, all the time. At the moment it certainly is! 21 people have submitted jokes and Colin currently has 63 jokes total to choose between. [i've got a file] Al
VeryPC Posted October 16, 2013 Author Posted October 16, 2013 Two files now!? Youbetcha. I'm like the CIA of the forum based daft competitions world. Al
Gonk Posted October 16, 2013 Posted October 16, 2013 A few jokes for the afternoon: Q: What was born to succeed? A: A budgie with a blunt beak. A wife went to the police station with her nextdoor neighbour to report her husband was missing. The policeman asked for a description. She said, "He's 35 years old, 6 feet, 4 inches tall, has dark eyes, dark wavy hair, an athletic build, weighs about 12 1/2 stone, is soft spoken and is good to the children." The nextdoor neighbour protested, "Your husband is 5 feet 4 inches tall, overweight, balding, has a big mouth and is mean to your children." The wife replied, "Yeah, but who wants HIM back?" and finally... Q: what do you call a teacher with no arms or legs? A: The Head... 1
StevieM Posted October 16, 2013 Posted October 16, 2013 One long joke Note to anybody else who reads the joke - It's American! For 'lever', read 'levver'!
Rawns Posted October 16, 2013 Posted October 16, 2013 I'd chip in some jokes but I can only think of rude NSFW ones!
X-13 Posted October 16, 2013 Posted October 16, 2013 I'd chip in some jokes but I can only think of rude NSFW ones! Stick 'em in a .txt file Call it NSFW jokes ??? PROFIT
VeryPC Posted October 16, 2013 Author Posted October 16, 2013 Ninja skills! Liam, one of our support technicians, demonstrates his awesome power in @Gonk's prize reveal video: http://youtu.be/I-q3F45bxTE Good luck for tomorrow everyone. Remember entries are still open, so if you get in now you'll be in the draw from tomorrow onwards until your name is drawn (but will be put back before the star prize PS4 draw). To enter just PM me your professional contact details if you are a UK based IT manager/tech type, OR if you've entered a VeryPC competition on EduGeek before, you can just speak up in the thread that you want back in and we'll add you. Al. 1
sparkeh Posted October 16, 2013 Posted October 16, 2013 Gah! Don't listen to that with headphones on, the noise at the end will deafen you. Was that a sneeze?
Gonk Posted October 16, 2013 Posted October 16, 2013 (edited) @VeryPC I like this "pen" prototype you have, keep up the good work! Would it be ok to swap the trackball for a T-Shirt of the XL variety? I'd gladly be a tester of said pen technology.... Edited October 16, 2013 by Gonk
X-13 Posted October 16, 2013 Posted October 16, 2013 I was a beta tester for the "pen" [ATTACH]20964[/ATTACH] [Harley Quinn mug is best mug.] 1
sparkeh Posted October 16, 2013 Posted October 16, 2013 I was a beta tester for the "pen" [ATTACH]20964[/ATTACH] [Harley Quinn mug is best mug.] First up, I thought that it was resting on your finger and the pen was tiny.
X-13 Posted October 16, 2013 Posted October 16, 2013 First up, I thought that it was resting on your finger and the pen was tiny. It is resting on my finger. What Al's video failed to convey is the fact he's really small.
sparkeh Posted October 16, 2013 Posted October 16, 2013 It is resting on my finger. What Al's video failed to convey is the fact he's really small. Turns out all the staff are small, just found this picture of someone on a sales call: http://t0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcSHbzUAhkcxlZgSua-qnNBYf5mFcUrip1gCecXOAH2_hcus-yRzKg
X-13 Posted October 16, 2013 Posted October 16, 2013 Turns out all the staff are small, just found this picture of someone on a sales call: http://t0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcSHbzUAhkcxlZgSua-qnNBYf5mFcUrip1gCecXOAH2_hcus-yRzKg So Gonk works for VeryPC? [Rite da feem toon, sing da feem toon...]
sparkeh Posted October 16, 2013 Posted October 16, 2013 So Gonk works for VeryPC? No no Gonk works in the church: http://t3.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTxwsye6shZZrqshFNJ66S_HN06fIYyoN25Dk2vVxjWTLtsWExSqg
VeryPC Posted October 16, 2013 Author Posted October 16, 2013 (edited) @VeryPC I like this "pen" prototype you have, keep up the good work! Would it be ok to swap the trackball for a T-Shirt of the XL variety? I'd gladly be a tester of said pen technology.... Sure fing! I'll make a note. Good choice btw - it's clearly the best T-shirt EVER created (that will be created - waiting on delivery now). Al Edited October 16, 2013 by VeryPC
VeryPC Posted October 16, 2013 Author Posted October 16, 2013 (edited) Gah! Don't listen to that with headphones on, the noise at the end will deafen you. Was that a sneeze? SNEEZE?!?!?!? It was clearly a massively effective ninja swipe chopping off the end of the video. Don't you recognise one of those when you hear one? Anyone would think you hadn't spent 7 years in a Tibetan monastery being trained by lethal monks! Al Edited October 16, 2013 by VeryPC
featured_spectre Posted October 16, 2013 Posted October 16, 2013 considering the tibetans are pacifists, you would be right...chinese monks however...
sparkeh Posted October 16, 2013 Posted October 16, 2013 SNEEZE?!?!?!? It was clearly a massively effective ninja swipe chopping off the end of the video. Don't you recognise one of those when you hear one? Anyone would think you hadn't spent 7 years in a Tibetan monastery being trained by lethal monks! Al Doh, not again. That mistake cost me dear in the world championship ninja fighting competition grand final I pretended to enter.
mac_shinobi Posted October 16, 2013 Posted October 16, 2013 SNEEZE?!?!?!? It was clearly a massively effective ninja swipe chopping off the end of the video. Don't you recognise one of those when you hear one? Anyone would think you hadn't spent 7 years in a Tibetan monastery being trained by lethal monks! Al I am ninja, you are ninja, Al is ninja too Askaninja.com I look forward to killing you soon !! Hoi yah !!!
sonofsanta Posted October 17, 2013 Posted October 17, 2013 Alas! I take a day off work and miss the beginning of the crap jokes. I've been beaten to the punch on most of my favourites! Alright, alright, how about: What's grey and can't swim? A filing cabinet. A ship full of tortoises crashes into a ship full of terrapins. It was a turtle disaster. A man handed me a wheel of cheese and asked if I could disguise his horse, I said "I don't think so, but I could probably marscapone." (thanks to Tim Vine for the last two there) 2
sparkeh Posted October 17, 2013 Posted October 17, 2013 (thanks to Tim Vine for the last two there) Well if we are using Tim Vine jokes then: "Crime in multi-story car parks, wrong on so many levels" 2
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