Bad week! (So far . . . . )

[bodminman]

Morning peeps,

 

as some of you will know/remember I've had a pretty crap year but since fathers day at the weekend, I'm feeling as though I am back down in the gutter.

 

My OH and 8 year old daughter really done there best to make it special but I just couldn't get over the fact that I should have been enjoying the day with one extra person. And since Sunday I've just felt angry, p1$$3d off etc etc etc.

 

I have tried to do some strenuous things to try and work the anger out but as soon as I stop, the clouds start appearing again.

 

I sometimes feel that by putting these sorts of things in writing will somehow help!

 

Thanks for listening.

[featured_spectre]

I know those feelings. In theory I should have 3 children, but I have 1. Lost a child at 19 weeks and at 34 weeks (They were twins and it was a miracle the 2nd one survived as long as it did when the first one died). Visit the link in my sig if you want to talk to others about it away from here.

[Netman]

Feel for you... just keep grinding it out - you'll get there.

[witch]

Just give yourself a break - of course days like that are going to make you feel bad - that's the nature of grief. You are NOT back at the beginning, or back in the gutter.

Think of it as a long walk in the hills - sometimes you have a long flat section and then you drop into a valley for a while.

Anger is, as I am sure you know, a very natural thing to feel in your circumstances and you are right, writing or talking about it will help.

Hang on in there - things will get better.

[ButterflyMoon]

That is the awful thing about grief, at times it feels like the loss was a very long time ago and we feel we are recovering finally. At others it feels like it happened two minutes ago and the pain is as strong as ever. I have no wise words for you Bodminman all I can say it allow yourself to feel what you feel in the moment. Pushing it down underneath only makes it worse. Allow yourself to cry if you need to most of all though be kind to yourself and not expect too much from yourself. Eduhug x

[Sunnyknight]

Post removed. I'll pm you instead.

[Smee]

the first year of loosing someone is horrible, it's always the first chritmas/birthday/easter/fathersday/etc without them. I lost my dad last year and at 40 something have become an orphan which sounds silly I know, even though I have my own children now and likely to have grandchildren in the not too distant future, I still feel like I've lost something I will never regain. I feel particularly foul this week, maybe it's fathers day having gone by. I've come very close to telling some people I work with some home truths that maybe they don't deserve to hear, I've also come close to just walking out today but I haven't. I've closed my office door and carried on.

What Im trying to say is your not alone, even though we will never likely ever meet I and others here feel your pain and understand as well as we can the way you feel. Its ok to be angry, people will understand xxx