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Operator: 999 whats your emergency? Man: You have to send help, my wife is having a baby! Operator: Is this her firstborn? Man: No this is her fiance. This will probably be me by Friday!

ok, we all have them. I just pulled this one at work. Lady: Argh I have something in my shoe Me: I'm pretty sure that would be your foot. Badumtss. Anyone got any dad jokes they care to share?

In my old school we did it, and colour coordinated everything also. Printers/MFDs were Red Thin Clients were Orange VOIP was Yellow Telephones/Faxes were Green Servers were Blue VPN was Purple Class Rooms with PCs were Black (includes science, english, maths, IT etc) Wifi was Grey DMZ was White

I have a couple of questions. How does it dissipate heat without the fans? I know you can have heatsinks etc, but surely they'd get hot as well.

http://i.imgur.com/1AI2Qjo.jpg

I work with 3x 17inch monitors side by side. Works well for me.

Telegraph has done an investigation with Channel 4, and found they've been match fixing some games. Could land them in hot water for some of their WC campaign. Football match-fixing deal casts cloud over World Cup - Telegraph

I thought this was a joke until I did a few more google searches. Turns out, it is a legit issue in Detroit. Detroit activists call for UN help as city shuts off water for thousands | Al Jazeera America

Ghana have been great this WC, did not expect them to beat USA, never mind draw 2-2 against Germany. The team that has made me have the most enjoyment by far is Costa Rica. They're not the biggest, by they could well go far. I am not expecting big things from them, but I do see them beating England by a goal at least. Seems the Iberians are some what lacklustre this year. Ronaldo failing to have any sort of spark or massive impact as he hoped. Xavi, Iniesta and Casillas just not doing their jobs like they're supposed too. Diego Costa has expressed an interest in playing for Brazil after this world cup as he made "a poor choice but still has the ability to go to Brazil as it is his nation of birth etc". Germany lit their game on fire with Portugal and assumed Ghana would be a walk over, and how wrong they were. They didn't expect the Ghanaians to be so physically dominating, so they had to rely on technical skills to hold the game. And credit too Klose on his goal (even if it was poached). Fully expect him to break the record now. 2 players that have stood out for me so far over all games...Ochoa (Mexicans goal keeper). He is a great ball stopper and proved this against brazil, saving something close to 25 shots and Joel Campbell (Costa Rican Forward). He has made his name this world cup as a ball holder, crosser and finisher. He has 34 caps for Costa Rica, he has 10 goals, which considering the teams they play in the confederations cup (Spain, Brazil, Mexico, Argentina, Honduras, Peru, etc) is no mean feat. His goals against teams include Spain, USA and Uruguay, which shows he can score against stiff competition, and whenever he has scored, they've never lost.

I am thoroughly enjoying the season still. Its been quite intense and lots of things up in the air. I am liking that Vettel isn't on the pedestal he put himself on and has to earn his positions now as the field has been leveled a bit more. Its generally more fun to watch.

She was a good age. But a shame another blackadder character is gone.

you know what, I said to the mrs (and she was surprised at me saying this)...all bets are off. I am not making another bet this world cup. She was shocked considering how well I've done over the last 5 major international competitions.

Yeh...I regret saying that. Lol. This world cup is nothing but surprises. Costa Rica remind me of Rorschach in Watchmen with the prison fight scene where he shouts "You guys are mistaken. I'm not locked in here with you....you're all locked in here with me." Edit Found image... http://i.imgur.com/sLR1TIX.gif

Now to watch the Germans be ruthlessly efficient.

Agreed. They've played very very well and can hold their heads high. Their striker has been amazing as well...Deserved one of his attempts at least.

Have to say...so far...Iran have played a blinding game. They've neutralised Argentina perfectly.

I am sure he means their forename...lol

I agree that France and Spain are both weak this year but they are on a par with England in terms of team strength this year. England lacks diversity where as the other nations have the choice of players to pick from As for the game just played...wow...Costa Rica could well go far with how they're playing. Beating Italy and Uruguay who were both expected to go through.

Wow...thats just...wow.

As I have said before, England is not a place for footballing talent anymore. Look at Nottingham Forest, they wont the CL (or back them the UEFA Cup Winners Cup) more times than any other English team and it was at a time when the League only allowed 3 foreign players. The English players back then were sought after in other nations like Germany, France, Belgium, Holland and Sweden. Now, how many english players play outside of England full time? 36 (excluding players playing in scotland, where the number goes up to 70ish)...compare this to France who have over 200 players abroad, Spain who have over 150 players abroad, Germany who have over 150 players abroad, Italy who have over 120 players abroad. Of the 36 players abroad, only 7 players play for a top 3 side of the respective lead they are in.

Have a listen to this...BBC Radio 5 live - In Short, Waddle on England: 'We never ever, ever learn' Hammer on Head of Nail.

25% will go to the stadium owners for use of the stadium (it has to be cleaned, maintained, staff paid etc) 20% going to the away team coffers to pay for flights or transport etc 45% then goes to the home team for transport, facilities, payment of officials etc Remaining 10% goes to the FA to cover "costs" of the administration of any cards or fines that need to be levied.

Having lost their first 2 World Cup matches, the England players are going to be asked a lot of searching questions. The first one being, "Did you pack these bags yourself?"

The trouble is, unlike the German Squad or the Spanish Squad or any other squad, England don't train enough together. The Germans and Spanish do 1 friendly a month in the down time (year after world cup or euros), England doesn't. In the run up, along side the qualifying games, they'll also throw friendlies into the mix. England rarely does.

Nope, Italy need to beat Uruguay by 2 goals to ensure that their GD is -3 so England don't finish bottom of the table, and England need a 3 goal margin to ensure they finish above Costa Rica on goal difference by +1 *edit* it was a typo, was not 200-1, was meant to be 20-1