speeech!?

[Disaster]

Rights so, the boss is getting married soon so I may have been assigned the task of writing a speech to deliver in the staff room

I'm clueless.

need ideas...

 

cheers

Edited June 17, 2009 by Disaster
more info added

[tsky]

Is he a friend or does he deserve some stick?

 

"well, finally, it appears his flat-pack bride from Russia has turned up... we might actually get some bandwidth back for classrooms from his excessive brides.ru surfing"

[Mandy]

Marriage is a 3 ring circus:-

Engagement ring

Wedding Ring

SuffeRing

[timzim]

I was lucky enough to marry Miss Right. It was only afterwards that I found out her first name was Always.

[ICT_GUY]

isbn 0-572-02410-x

 

Wedding speaches and toasts, got mine from the charity shop and its not let me down yet.

 

[ame=http://www.amazon.co.uk/Wedding-Speeches-Toasts-Barbara-Jeffery/dp/057202410X/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1245250490&sr=8-1]Wedding Speeches and Toasts: Amazon.co.uk: Barbara Jeffery: Books[/ame]

[SteveBentley]

"Over the years, I've come to regard [insert name] as someone I..... met."

 

ahh you can't go wrong paraphrasing Arnold J Rimmer

[cl0n3]

I was best man at my twins wedding last saturday, here's what I put together for it:

 

 

I would like to welcome everyone,

 

Before I waffle on and make no sense, would Frank, the father of the bride like to say a few words?.....

 

Thanks Frank

 

I'm going to further attempt to put off my waffling by asking for a few words from Jason, the groom..........

 

Thanks Jason, I hope you made the most of your speech, now that you're a married man that'll be the last time you get to speak for 3 minutes without being interrupted.

 

Some more thank yous are in order.

 

Thank you Chris and Steven, who bottled out of doing this speech leaving me in the lurch, [point at Chris] I have copies ordered of all photos with you In a kilt which will make lovely birthday cards for your son up until he hits 16....or calls you Christine, which ever first.

 

Of course, thank you all for attending and joining in with celebrating this amazing day.

 

This is my first time at being a best man (my better half refers to me as an adequate man) and I'm terrible at speeches, but I'll try my best because Jason said if I do a good job today, I can be best man at his next wedding too.

 

I've been asked to pass on a few bits of advice, establish the ground rules early on and who's boss.....then do everything Charlotte says and always remember to tell your wife those three important little words.....You're right dear

 

I was told that it is customary to bring up some old embarrassing stories of the groom from years gone by but I was unable to do this as when I think of Jason from years gone by the first thing that comes to my mind is how kind and generous he is.

 

Anyone who knows him, I'm sure can think of a time when he has offered help in some way.

 

I was hoping to put a few other people on the spot by getting a few of his friends to share some things about him:

{Gesture to and name whoever I can see to say a few things]

 

I know Jason will make a thoughtful husband, like the time when I had to find out what Charlotte's favourite kind of flower was....he replied 'self -raising’.

 

I know Jason will make a caring husband, like the time they were out for a walk and Charlotte mentioned that she was getting tired, Jason replied 'Ok dear, you can stop giving me a piggy back after we get past this mud'.

 

I know Jason will make a loving husband, like the time when he was planning a romantic night: he bought a crate of Stella, stuff for a BBQ and every Rocky film on DVD

 

I do have to say how lucky you are Jason

You will leave here having gained a wife that is warm, loving and caring.

[Face Charli]

And Charlotte [pause]

How lucky you are as well [pause]

You leave today having gained a [pause]

A lot of nice presents

 

HERES TO LOVE, LAUGHTER,

AND HAPPILY EVER AFTER,

AS Jason and Charlotte START THEIR NEW LIFE,

PLEASE STAND & TOAST THE NEW HUSBAND & WIFE.

 

If you would all be up standing in my toast

 

To the new Mr and Mrs ######

Jason and Charlotte

[Guest coquet636]

Great speech shane... might remember the next wedding joke.. lol