[website] Famous Works of Irish Literature as Limericks by Amanda Lehr

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Link: Famous Works of Irish Literature as Limericks - McSweeney’s Internet Tendency

 

The Picture of Dorian Gray by Oscar Wilde

 

A young man of beauty and grace

Tries to shield his good name from disgrace.

He looks like a saint

While he withers in paint,

But he still finds himself losing face.

 

Dracula by Bram Stoker

 

A solicitor pays his respects

To a count whom no surface reflects,

And who moves to the UK

To follow his outré

Desire to suck on some necks.

 

Ulysses by James Joyce

 

A lass who keeps raising her dress

Is awash with erotic distress.

’Spite her wandering womb,

Should she keep Leo Bloom?

Why yes, she says, yes she will, yes.

 

“A Modest Proposal” by Jonathan Swift

 

A man caused a hullabaloo

By posting this practical view:

Economics call for

Irish babes of the poor

To be served to the rich as ragout.

 

Sherlock Holmes by Sir Arthur Conan Doyle

 

The world’s most proficient detective

Has deductive techniques most effective.

(Though his Watson stays close

With an opium dose

Lest Holmes hit him with an invective.)

 

The Lion, The Witch, and the Wardrobe by C. S. Lewis

 

Four children go looking for glory

In this sweet portal fantasy story.

Through a wardrobe they’re drawn,

Where they meet a faun and

A leonine Christ allegory.

 

(Though one brother, brimming with spite,

Takes the White Witch’s side in their fight.

He sells out his siblings

So he can keep nibbling

His portion of Turkish delight.)

 

Normal People by Sally Rooney

 

A Sligo-born laddie and lass

Are close, yet divided by class.

Are they truly peers?

By turns, each one fears

That they’re naught but a hot piece of ass.

 

Waiting for Godot by Samuel Beckett

 

Two gents who are meeting Godot

Are anxious that he’ll never show.

So, they wait, and they wait

Till the hour grows late

And