I seek advice from the great hive mind of edugeek :-) on the same kind of issue.
As it's easter I decided to give our IT rooms an overhaul and tidy up some of the computers a bit, I've discovered that about 10 of them are still running update 14 of the java, so I thought 'oh lets get these computers upgraded to the right version as AD doesn't seem to be deploying the java update to them' little did i know it would turn into a nightmare for me.
basically I have hit a snag where i physically cannot get the update 14 of java to remove itself from my sight, it refuses to update, it refuses to uninstall, i even tried getting my hands on a .msi of the 14 update, but it still refuses, i keep getting the cannot find the msi on network error, as it was hosted on an old server before I started (which is why i went hunting for the 14 update msi, but it just errors saying it's not valid)
I've even tried FN-GM's script from above, and java just refuses to budge!
Any suggestions (or even pointing out blind stupid mistakes i've made here) would be much appreated.