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Jokes/Interweb Things Thread, Friday Joke [Posted Early On Thursday Evening] My Friend David lost his ID... in Fun Stuff; Now we just call him Dav....
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    DaveP's Avatar
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    Friday Joke [Posted Early On Thursday Evening] My Friend David lost his ID...

    Now we just call him Dav.


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    Gatt's Avatar
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    Urgh!!!

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    very poor

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    DaveP's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by jinnantonnixx View Post
    very poor
    Yeah. I thought I had spotted a theme running through the Friday Jokes.

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    Gatt's Avatar
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    And it was at this time, during the darkest days of Christianity that as he was nailed to the Cross, and raised up for all to gaze upon his tortured and twisted body, he looked down wearily at his 12 apostles and speaking softly with his last gasping breath, said unto them. "Don't touch my fg Easter Eggs, I'll be back on Monday!"

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    Adele called her first albums 19 & 21 because they are numbers that have special importance to her life

    Her follow up



    is due out in the summer........
    Last edited by tech_guy; 21st April 2011 at 09:24 PM.

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    glennda's Avatar
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    I'm not really a footy fan but this one was quite good.


    I can't play FIFA any more; it's too unrealistic for me... Yesterday I scored with Fernando Torres!

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    webman's Avatar
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    An old friend of mine was a Soldier - he survived pepper spray and mustard gas. Now he is a seasoned veteran.

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    Gatt's Avatar
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    A duck walks into a bar and asks: "Got any bread?"
    Barman says: "No."
    Duck says: "Got any bread?"
    Barman says: "No."
    Duck says: "Got any bread?"
    Barman says: "No, we have no bread."
    Duck says: "Got any bread?"
    Barman says: "No, we haven't got any fg bread."
    Duck says: "Got any bread?"
    Barman says: "No, are you deaf?! We haven't got any fg bread, ask me again and I'll nail your fg beak to the bar you irritating bd of a fg bird!"

    Duck says: "Got any nails?"
    Barman says: "No."

    Duck says: "Got any bread?

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    webman's Avatar
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    I love that duck one Gatt Talking of ducks... How do you turn a duck into a soul singer? Put it into a microwave until it’s bill withers.

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    DaveP's Avatar
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    A hungry traveller stops at a monastery and is taken to the kitchens. A brother is frying chips. 'Are you the friar?' he asks. 'No. I'm the chip monk,' he replies.

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    Mans Sits waiting for his wife to cook him breakfast, he hears a thud and goe into the kitchen to find her dead on the floor. He goes into a blind panic then suddenly remembers weatherspoons do breakfast till 11:30

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    DaveP's Avatar
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    Using Comic Sans: My wife refused to stop using it. Tonight I finally convinced her by explaining it like this:

    Using Comic Sans is like having bad body odor - you don't notice it, your friends can't stand it, but nobody is impolite enough to tell you.

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