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Jokes/Interweb Things Thread, A young man joins the army... in Fun Stuff; When it came to target practice there was a shortage of rifles so the drill sergeant handed him a stick ...
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    Fatmas's Avatar
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    A young man joins the army...

    When it came to target practice there was a shortage of rifles so the drill sergeant handed him a stick and told him to just say "Bangity bang bang!".
    When they practiced with bayonets there weren't enough to go around so the drill sergeant again handed him a stick and told him to just say "Stabity stab stab!".

    Fast forward a few months and the man's unit is on the way to storm the beaches of France. Again, there are not enough rifles to go around so the young man is given a stick.
    As he storms the beaches, he sees a German soldier on a ridge. He knows he is going to die so he thinks "What the heck" and points the stick at him shouting "Bangity! bang! bang!", the German drops dead. The young man is shocked but keeps moving up the beach. As he gets to the top he is confronted by another German, he moves the stick towards him shouting "Stabity! stab! stab!". The German drops dead.

    He then sees a German walking towards him, the man raises his stick and shouts "Bangity bang bang!". The German keeps walking. He then runs at the German shouting "Stabity stab stab!". The German walks over him fatally wounding the young man. The last thing the young man hears from the German is: "Tankity tank tank".

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    The start of that joke was taken from a true story:

    When it came to target practice there was a shortage of rifles so the drill sergeant handed him a stick and told him to just say "Bangity bang bang!".
    When they practiced with bayonets there weren't enough to go around so the drill sergeant again handed him a stick and told him to just say "Stabity stab stab!".


    It ends like this though:

    Fast forward a few months and the man's unit is on the way to Afghanistan, fighting a war that isn't ours, without most of the proper equipment required to carry out the job.

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    Fatmas's Avatar
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    ...Instead of body armour, the young man was given a baking tray and told not to get shot.

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    On an historical note I believe the russians defending Stalingrad during World War Two were so short of guns and bullets they sent soldiers out in pairs one with the gun the other with the bullets. When one of them was killed the other one could then loot his corpse for whatever he needed to fight back.

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