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Jokes/Interweb Things Thread, calendar in Fun Stuff; i once stole a calendar.....i got 12 months for it...
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    Inbir316's Avatar
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    calendar

    i once stole a calendar.....i got 12 months for it

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    DanW's Avatar
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    A man walks into a bar ........ you'd think he'd have seen it.

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    Why did the chewing gum cross the road?



    Because it was stuck to the chicken's foot

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    witch's Avatar
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    " oh no", said an atom, "I've lost an electron!"
    his friend said.... "are you positive?"

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    webman's Avatar
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    Man goes to doctors complaining of strawberries growing out of his head. The doctor says, "I've got some cream for those!"

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    SeanVin's Avatar
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    Cow 1: I've just been artificially inseminated!

    Cow 2: Are you sure?

    Cow 1: Yep, Straight up, no bull.

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    somabc's Avatar
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    Knock, Knock
    Who's there?
    Dr
    Dr Who?
    Yes

    *sorry*

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    joe90bass's Avatar
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    Short fairy tale

    One day, long, long ago....... there lived a woman who did not whine, nag or complain.






    But this was a long time ago....... and it was just that one day.





    The End
    Attached Images Attached Images

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    Uses strong language but pretty funny.

    YouTube - Ronaldo Leaves Utd

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    somabc's Avatar
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    Why did the Chicken cross the Möbius Strip?
    to get to the other .. er ...

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    Guy goes to doctors due to a hearing problem

    Doc looks in his ears and finds jelly and blamonge in one ear and sponge and custard in the other.

    And says 'I think you're a triffle deaf'

    Sorry

    Oh, and another from when my son was at primary school i.e. a long time ago

    What shakes at the bottom of the sea?

    Its a nervous wreck of course

    Might just be bad enough for an xmas cracker joke

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    Inbir316's Avatar
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    wat do you call a one eyed dinosaur?





    ithinkhesaurus




    what do you call a 3 eyed dinosaur?


    doyouthinkhesaurus

  14. #14

    Hightower's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Inbir316 View Post
    what do you call a 3 eyed dinosaur?


    doyouthinkhesaurus
    Shouldn't that one be the 1 eyes dinosaur?

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    With my wife I don't get no respect. I made a toast on her birthday to 'the best woman a man ever had.' The waiter joined me.

    Last week I told my psychiatrist, "I keep thinking about suicide." He told me from now on I have to pay in advance.


    I was making love to this girl and she started crying. I said, "Are you going to hate yourself in the morning?" She said, "No, I hate myself now."

    When I was born the doctor took one look at my face, turned me over and said, "Look, twins!"

    I was such an ugly kid. When I played in the sandbox the cat kept covering me up.

    Rodney Dangerfield RIP.

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