Damm - you've seen through my cunning plan!If you just want more rep points, just say
Oaktech (14th June 2012)
I'm not sure I fit into any of these stereotypes at the moment. Although I do posses the following qualities:
- Rare female techy and often overlooked
- Moderate interest in techy things and gamer of MMOs
- User baiter of outstanding talent. Knowledge is power and knowledge of service level agreements and company IT policies is power over users! Feel my wrath lowly peons for I wield the Stave of Password-complexity-policy and wear the Robes of Change-and-configuration-management-policy-won't-allow-this (did I mention I'm an MMO gamer?) It must be said that I don't get to wield these powers so much these days in the second line role, but I do have some fond memories of first line support...
- Moderately technical and can baffle ordinary peons but cannot last in an allout nerd-fest. Greater interest in ITIL policy and process management (see above)
- Prolific supporter of the 'help yourself' approach - I'd rather send a lengthy set of instructions as the small piece of optimism still alive in me hopes that the end user will refer back to this when said issue occurs again. This is foolish, I know, but still.
- Sponge - I learn fast and absorb knowledge like a sponge meaning I pick up new tech and complex concepts really fast. Also means I must always push myself to learn and understand new things or I become bored.
I'm sure I'll think of more.
The 'surprised you don't know'
This particular specimen is often the source of much entertainment and guaranteed to generate sarcastic replies in return. To be fair, he's not always a 'know all' and admits to his own limitations. But this guy will almost get into a state of distress when you put your hand up to not knowing (usually the following) technologies:
"What do you mean you don't know scripting? All good IT people know that"
"What? You don't know anything about SQL?"
"Come on! You need to know exchange like the back of your hand"
Its usually those three, all of which are considered a bit 'specialist' by most general support people. However, unlike the 'know all' who if he does know will simply fix it without bothering to explain to you what he did, the 'SYDK' will usually at least attempt to run through it with you and ensure its documented.
you all missed one , i think the two titles explain themselves
This indivual eitehr restarts the device and hope it works or turns it off and then on again and hope for the best.
if this dont work then they will have the new title of "The wipe and loader"
A recent conversation on another thread has led to the addition of another tongue in cheek fine specimen:
The Two Foot Diver
More commonly recognised as the techie who dives into every new bit of technology with both feet regardless of whether its any good or not. As soon as a new release of windows comes out (having already spent months on the beta version), there he is, rolling it out en masse to the network and then usually getting loads of grief in return thanks to the fact its probably broken half the applications. Tells everyone they should be grateful because they've got the latest kit even quoting "You should feel lucky to have Windows 8, the MoD and NHS are still using XP". But is often found backtracking and desperately searching for backups of those old Windows XP/7 disk images that he cleared off the server in the name of procurement.
Last edited by superatticman; 20th June 2013 at 03:12 PM.
He of unrealistic expectations:
- Someone who has unrealistic expectations of the performance of a device or software and is unaware of or chooses to ignore known limitations. Most commonly seen employing VM hosts.
- "What do you mean a single quad core processor with 4GB of RAM can't handle 10 live server VMs and a VM host OS? That is outrageous and unacceptable! The slow performance of my VMs are nothing to do with the spec of this system, it's brand new top spec. It must be your fault!"
- "What do you mean that 500GB isn't enough space for 2500 roaming user profiles?"
- "We only need a 10Meg line..."
This guy - knows it all. No, really. He was never born - he was the result of a mish-mash of Encarta, the Matrix and a few dodgy Command Lines.
If you ever have a problem, he knows the reason for it, what you should have done to fix it, and how to prevent it in the future.
The only problem is that he/she/it was born with a 6th sense - which is to predict the exact time when a problem will occur and to flee the scene and not be able to answer phone calls/texts/emails.
So ultimately, you get landed with the job and after much troubleshooting and a long lengthy fix to resolve the problem, a vibe is sent out. Much alike a high-pitched whistle to dogs - this call snaps the Wanderer out of his/her/it's trance and they then retreat back to their lair and then proceed to tell you what you should have done.
Last edited by happymeal; 20th June 2013 at 04:27 PM. Reason: grrr - forgot <b> and </b> doesn't make it go all [B]BOLD[/B]
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