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General Chat Thread, The IT Ten Commandments.... in General; Originally Posted by JJonas Thou shalt not plan a lesson around a website without checking it works in school first. ...
  1. #31

    LeMarchand's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by JJonas View Post
    Thou shalt not plan a lesson around a website without checking it works in school first.

    If thou dost plan a lesson around a website without checking it works thou must not wail on the IT staff when it fails.

    The filtering system works in mysterious ways, Do not rely on it to give you access to a web site that worked last week, last night, this morning or at the start of thy lesson.
    Verily, this morning one sinner hast already broken these three commandments .

  2. #32
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    Quote Originally Posted by alan-d View Post
    Thou shall praise and worsip the ground walked upon by IT Technicians.

    (and pay them accordingly)
    LOL.........I like this........and totally agree!!

  3. Thanks to elloyd69 from:

    alan-d (13th July 2009)

  4. #33

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    Thou shalt not purchase software or hardware without consulting with the IT staff.

  5. Thanks to JJonas from:

    john (13th July 2009)

  6. #34

    mac_shinobi's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by alan-d View Post
    Thou shall praise and worsip the ground walked upon by IT Technicians.

    (and pay them accordingly)
    Used to work as an IT tech and that never worked doh !

  7. #35

    sparkeh's Avatar
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    Thou shalt not approach IT support without a packet of biscuits.

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    Wils86 (13th July 2009)

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    10 Commandments for Network Admins:

    1. Thou shalt understand the language of binary.
    10. Do what thou wilt shalt be the whole of the law.

  10. 7 Thanks to jamesb:

    Fuzzz (13th July 2009), GrumbleDook (13th July 2009), mac_shinobi (13th July 2009), Maz (14th July 2009), sparkeh (13th July 2009), Talorin (14th July 2009), Wils86 (13th July 2009)

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    Quote Originally Posted by tech_guy View Post
    Thou shalt not shout obscenities at a stupid laptop because the children in the playground can hear you....
    Damn, another load of Hail Mary's

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    Thou shalt stoppeth not the IT Technicians in the Corridors to consult with them, nor in the Staff Room, nor in the Dining Hall, nor in the Toilets, for they know not which Computer Room is free next period, nor do they know what you have just emailed them (even though they seeth all and knoweth all, sometimes they just forgetteth as their memory is likened unto a sieve).

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    john (13th July 2009), laserblazer (13th July 2009), Little-Miss (13th July 2009), mikeglover (29th July 2009)

  14. #39

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    Quote Originally Posted by jamesb View Post
    10 Commandments for Network Admins:

    1. Thou shalt understand the language of binary.
    10. Do what thou wilt shalt be the whole of the law.
    Oh lord forgive me for I am sad for getting this straight away lol

  15. #40

    tmcd35's Avatar
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    We are the your Lord Gods, who brought you out of the land of Abacus, out of the house of filing cabnets;

    Do not have any other gods before us

    You shall make yourself an idol, whether in the form of anything that is animal (pengiuns), vegitable (apples, apricots) or minerial (er, windows)

    You shall bow down to them or worship them; for we your Lord Gods are vengeful Gods, punishing users with BSODs and viri

    but showing steadfast uptime to the users who love us and keep our commandments

    You shall not make wrongful use of the username, for the Lords will not acquit anyone who misuses his username

    Remember the last day of term and keep it holy (buy your techies biscuits!)

    For the school holidays we shall labour and do all our work

    But the last day of term is holy to your Lord Gods; you shall not pray upon them to work - you, your staff or your pupils, your male or female admins, or the visitors upon your premises

    For six weeks the Lords made the network and the file system, the backups and all that is in them, but they rested on the last day of term; therefore the Lords blessed the holy days and expected biscuits upon it.

    Honor your Technicians and Network Manager, so that your logons may be long in the network that your Lord Gods are giving you.

    You shall not murder (even a ZX80 can be given productive use)

    You shall commit adultery (for all operating systems be the Mac, Linux or Windows have their use)

    You shall not steal (for bandwidth and disk space is for everybodys use - not just your own)

    You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor (nor still his logon such the you may gain or cause disruption to the network)

    You shall not covet your neighbor's computer, you shall not covet your neighbor's home space, or mouse, or keyboard, or anything that your neighbor should be working with.

  16. #41

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    Quote Originally Posted by jamesb View Post
    10 Commandments for Network Admins:

    1. Thou shalt understand the language of binary.
    10. Do what thou wilt shalt be the whole of the law.
    Makes 10 of us lol

  17. #42

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    The shalt not phoneth the IT Technician at home to ask how to set up your wireless network, especially so if it is late at night.

  18. #43

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    Quote Originally Posted by JJonas View Post
    The shalt not phoneth the IT Technician at home to ask how to set up your wireless network, especially so if it is late at night.
    Should not call anyone at home and especially not an IT Technician and especially more so if its a technical subject such as the aformentioned item ( setting up wireless or the likes )

  19. #44


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    Quote Originally Posted by mac_shinobi View Post
    Should not call anyone at home and especially not an IT Technician and especially more so if its a technical subject such as the aformentioned item ( setting up wireless or the likes )unless you are willing to pay the proper tribute of gold and the product of the grape from fermenting.
    Fixed.
    Last edited by jamesb; 13th July 2009 at 02:15 PM.

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  21. #45


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    1. thou shall not spill milk in your laptop and leave it to go furry then expect me to sondem it as it still works

    2. thou shall remember your password and not expect me to

    3. thou shall not change your laptops password without changing your domain password to match

    4. thou shall not bug tecd 10 seconds before they leave for the day

    5. thou shall report the problem not what you think will solve it

    6. thou shall tell me what you did not what you think i need to hear

    7. thou shall change the backup tape and if you dont dont moan you deleted/cottupted a file

    8. thou shall check batteries in appropriate devices before calling

    9. thou shalt listen to what you are told so i dont hav to tell you every week

    10. thou shall provide cake/crisps/choccy hob nobs



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