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General Chat Thread, April 1st is coming in General; Originally Posted by X-13 I would love to do the facebook one, but I can't see SMT finding it funny... ...
  1. #16

    sonofsanta's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by X-13 View Post
    I would love to do the facebook one, but I can't see SMT finding it funny...


    People here are way to serious...
    That's some pretty evil rep power you've got there...
    April 1st is coming-666rep.png

  2. #17


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    Forgetting that April 1st wasn't a school day in 2012 or 2013, I've had this sitting in my drafts folder, waiting for it's turn ...


    Dear All,


    You may be aware that we have been experiencing some intermittent problems with X, our main 'file' server. After much tenacious investigation we believe we have identified the issue but we will need your assistance to rectify it.


    As technically adept users you will know your files and are stored as 'data' arranged in Blocks, Bytes and at the most fundamental level, Bits. These are stored on disc platters which rotate at high speed - 7500 to 15000 revolutions per minute (rather faster than those old Perry Como records to be sure!).


    Increases in storage density mean that these bits are now arranged on the disc platters vertically instead of the old method of storing them horizontally (rather like storing matches, you will get more in an area if you stand them upright). Unfortunately, the nature of our data means that this can cause two problems. First when discs stop spinning for a rest (during break or lunch), data can bunch up together and the 0's can get squashed and end up looking a lot like 1's. In some cases this can be so severe that the data becomes like a member of the Russian parliament, corrupted. The second problem is that files can sometimes slip on the disc and bang against each other, further exacerbating the squashing of the 0's and also unbalancing the disc platters which can cause wavy lines when documents are printed, interference on video and strange moaning sounds within mp3's and audio files. In the worst case, bits can fall over pushing documents off the disc entirely or causing a catastrophic domino like cascade of destruction!


    To ease the situation we need to create some buffer zones between files and even within documents themselves. These should absorb the energy of impacts rather like the crumple zone on a car. Doing so is easy, please just remember to insert a few blanks lines between paragraphs and, at the end of documents just add a few blank pages, empty PowerPoint slides or in a spread sheet, a few blank worksheets. Double spacing of paragraphs in email is really helpful too.


    I f y o u r i n f o r m a t i o n i s r e a l l y i m p o r t n a t, c o n s i d e r s p a c e s b e t w e e n t h e l e t t e r s o f w o r d s f o r m a x i u m p r o t e c t i o n.


    We hope to be able to upgrade the type of bits we use over the Easter and in the summer implement a parroty protection scheme, until then please accept my apologies for any inconvenience this may cause and thank you in advance for your cooperation.


    Yours etc,

  3. Thanks to pcstru from:

    HarryMonkey (13th March 2014)

  4. #18
    SovietRussia's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by sonofsanta View Post
    I did a nice little April Fools two or three years ago - quite disappointed I can't use it again for a couple of years, but I need to wait for people to forget about it...

    We set up a Facebook link on our Intranet page and left it sitting there, quiet and unassuming. Clicking it took users to a webpage with this in the middle:
    Attachment 23321
    The block of text at the bottom appears at about 60% on the counter. It's only a modified email header, but it looks technical

    When the counter gets to 100%, the page redirects to:
    Attachment 23322

    Which counts to 100% then redirects to:
    Attachment 23323

    Which counts to 100% then changes to:
    Attachment 23324

    Submitting anything (no validation, I didn't care that much) takes you to:
    Attachment 23325

    Which, after much counting up to 100% then delaying a little longer for tension, changes to:
    Attachment 23326

    The last page was originally an ASPX file so it could keep count of how many fell for it, but I couldnae be bothered to get it working again once the old intranet server was decommissioned.

    If you want to see it in action, or use it yourself, I've zipped it up and put it on my SkyDrive OneDrive @ http://1drv.ms/O5Zy1w. discovery.html is the first page to run - that then goes through the rest from there. Let me know if you use it and if people fall for it, the howls of rage were thoroughly entertaining when we went with it
    That is just, brilliant.

  5. Thanks to SovietRussia from:

    sonofsanta (13th March 2014)

  6. #19

    X-13's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by sonofsanta View Post
    That's some pretty evil rep power you've got there...
    Click image for larger version. 

Name:	666rep.PNG 
Views:	281 
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ID:	23331
    So I've been told...

    Attachment 23335

  7. #20
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    Call manager fun *redirects every office number to pizza hut*
    *redirects phones onto their own 2nd line*

  8. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by bondbill2k2 View Post
    Call manager fun *redirects every office number to pizza hut*
    *redirects phones onto their own 2nd line*
    Given me an idea!

  9. #22

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    Thinking of setting everyones internet homepage to End of the Internet

  10. 2 Thanks to Techykev:

    Oaktech (13th March 2014), vikpaw (1st April 2014)

  11. #23


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    Quote Originally Posted by mrbios View Post
    A couple of years ago we stuck a sign over the touch panels on the photocopiers which said they were now voice enabled along with subsequent commands.

    That never should have worked, but we were in stitches first thing in the morning over how gullible some teachers are. I think i found the idea on here some years ago.
    take it a stage further if you can see one use its web interface so that it demonstratably "works" for 1 person

  12. #24

    Garacesh's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by mrbios View Post
    A couple of years ago we stuck a sign over the touch panels on the photocopiers which said they were now voice enabled along with subsequent commands.
    Absolute genius!
    I may just have to do this..

  13. #25

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    Quote Originally Posted by mrbios View Post
    A couple of years ago we stuck a sign over the touch panels on the photocopiers which said they were now voice enabled along with subsequent commands.

    That never should have worked, but we were in stitches first thing in the morning over how gullible some teachers are. I think i found the idea on here some years ago.
    I'm on the case! April 1st is coming-do-flip.png

  14. Thanks to Bompalompalomp from:

    Garacesh (13th March 2014)

  15. #26

    featured_spectre's Avatar
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    thing is, all of our machines are booked for a service on the 31st, so we could put this on all of them!

  16. Thanks to featured_spectre from:

    Garacesh (13th March 2014)

  17. #27
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bompalompalomp View Post
    I'm on the case! Click image for larger version. 

Name:	do a flip.png 
Views:	349 
Size:	339.0 KB 
ID:	23342
    You're putting a lot of effort in. I just downloaded the Sharp one for ours: My version of the 'Voice Activated Printer' april fools prank... currently causing mayhem at my workplace. "COPY!.... COPPPYYYYYYYY!!!" : reddit.com

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    beany1 (1st April 2014), hardtailstar (31st March 2014), stevenlong1985 (13th March 2014)

  19. #28
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bompalompalomp View Post
    I'm on the case! Click image for larger version. 

Name:	do a flip.png 
Views:	349 
Size:	339.0 KB 
ID:	23342
    Even using InDesign, that is dedication.

  20. #29

    sonofsanta's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by SovietRussia View Post
    Even using InDesign, that is dedication.
    I thought that - the mark of a committed professional, not just chucking it together in Word.

  21. #30
    SovietRussia's Avatar
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    April 1st is coming-fool.png

    Funny what you can do with some CSS xD

  22. 4 Thanks to SovietRussia:

    beany1 (1st April 2014), Garacesh (13th March 2014), hardtailstar (31st March 2014), sonofsanta (13th March 2014)



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